和谐英语

增强语句表现力的有效方法

2007-11-05来源:
  一、避免使用语意弱的“be”动词。

  1、把句中的表语转换为不同的修饰语。例如:

  Weak: The trees are bare. The grass is brown. The landscape seems drab. Revision:The brown grass and bare trees form a drab landscape. (转换为前置定语)

  Or: The landscape, bare and brown, begged for spring green. (转换为并列结构作后置定语)

  2、将作表语用的形容词或名词变为行为动词。


  例如:

  1) Weak: The team members are good players.

  Revision: The team members play well.

  2) Weak: One worker’s plan is the elimination of tardiness.

  Revision: One worker’s plan eliminates tardiness.

  3、在以“here”或“there”开头的句子中,把“be”动词后的名词代词变成改写句的主语。例如:

  1) Weak: There is no opportunity for promotion.

  Revision: No opportunity for promotion exists.

  2) Weak: Here are the books you ordered.

  Revision: The books you ordered have arrived.

  二、多用语意具体的动词,保持句意简洁明了。例如:

  1、Poor: My supervisor went past my desk.

  Better: My supervisor sauntered (=walked slowly) past my desk.

  2、Poor: She is a careful shopper.

  Better: She compares prices and quality.

  三、尽量运用主动语态。例如:

  1、Weak: The organization has been supported by charity.

  Better: Charity has supported the organization.

  2、Weak: The biscuits were stacked on a plate.

  Better: Mother stacked the biscuits on a plate.

  四、防止使用语意冗长累赘的词语。例如:

  1、Wordy: My little sister has a preference for chocolate milk.

  Improved: My little sister prefers chocolate milk.

  2、Wordy: We are in receipt of your letter and intend to follow your recommendations.

  Improved: We have received your letter and intended to follow your recommendation.

  3、Redundant: We had a serious crisis at school yesterday when our chemistry laboratory caught fire.

  Improved: We had a crisis at school yesterday when our chemistry laboratory caught fire.

  4、Redundant: My sister and I bought the same, identical dress in different stores.

  Improved: My sister and I bought the same dress in different stores.

  五、杜绝滥用陈旧词语或难懂的专业术语。例如:

  1、Weak: They will not agree to his proposals in any shape or form.

  Improved: They will not agree to any of his proposals.

  2、Weak: I need her financial input before I can guesstimate our expenditures next fall.

  Improved: I need her financial figures before I can estimate our expenditures next fall.