英语诗歌：Understanding Women

　　If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman 吻她吧，不够君子

　　If you don't, you are not a man 不吻吧，不象汉子

　　If you praise her, she thinks you are lying 夸她吧，说你欺骗

　　If you don't, you are good for nothing 不夸吧，说你笨蛋

　　If you agree to all her likes, she is abusing 顺她吧，说你气管炎

　　If you don't, you are not understanding 不顺吧，不善解人

　　If you make romance, you are an 'experienced man' 太浪漫，疑你老练

　　If you don't you are half a man 太规矩，魅力不足

　　If you visit her too often, she thinks it is boring 常看她，招她厌烦

　　If you don't, she accuses you of double crossing 少去点，怨你猎艳

　　If you are well dressed, she says you are a playboy 穿得好，说你花心

　　If you don't, you are a dull boy 邋遢些，缺个心眼

　　If you are jealous, she says it's bad 吃醋吧，你太狭隘

　　If you don't, she thinks you do not love her 大度点，说你不爱

　　If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her 求欢吧，不够尊重

　　If you don't, she thinks you do not like her 安分吧，不够爱宠

　　If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait 你晚了，她等得烦

　　If she is late, she says that's a girl's way 它晚了，女孩特权

　　If you visit another, she accuses you of being a heel 你访友，是你堕落

　　If she is visited by another, 'oh it's natural, we are girls' 她聚会，天性其乐

　　If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you are cold 少亲她，你太冷淡

　　If you kiss her too many, she yells that you are taking advantage 老亲她，便宜你占

　　If you fail to help her in crossing the street, you lack ethics 过街不管，道德有缺憾

　　If you do, she thinks it's just one of the man's tactics 领着她走，男人耍手段

　　If you stare at other, she accuses you of flirting 你看别人，是挑逗风情

　　If she is stared by others, she says that they are just admiring 别人看她， 是仰慕佳绝

　　If you talk, she wants you to listen 你要说话，它让你听

　　If you listen, she wants you to talk 洗耳恭听，她逼你开言

　　Oh God! you created those creature called "WOMAN' 上帝啊！为何拆我骨头造女人？

　　So simple, yet so complex 简简繁繁

　　So weak, yet so powerful 弱弱强强

　　So confusing, yet so desirable 我晕头转向，我魂牵梦扰

　　"O LORD, tell me what to do. AMEN" 上帝啊！求你告我怎么办？