女人出轨的常见若干原因

When Thea and her husband moved to Los Angeles a few years ago, she had no friends close by and was alone frequently while her husband worked long hours. Though Thea, who asked that her full name not be used, says her husband was the "best friend someone could have," the spark, and sex, were gone.

几年前西娅和丈夫搬迁到洛杉矶时，她周围没有朋友，在丈夫整天忙于工作时，她经常感觉非常孤单。按照西娅的要求，我们不用她全名。尽管西娅说丈夫曾经是她的知己，但现在两人之间已没有了火花，也没有性生活。

Seeking company and a little romance, Thea became a member of AshleyMadison.com, a web site that connects married people wanting to have an affair.

渴求陪伴也想要寻找些许的浪漫，于是西娅注册成为AshleyMadison.com网站的会员，该网站中有很多已婚却有出轨意图的人。

After a few dates with a man she connected with, she began an ongoing affair. "He was giving me all of the stuff my husband wasn't -- attention and affection," she says.

在和一个男人约会几次之后，她真的有了外遇。“他能给我一切我丈夫不能给的东西——那就是关注和爱慕”她说。

There are many reasons for infidelity, such as revenge, boredom, the thrill of sexual novelty, sexual addiction. But experts say that a large majority of the time, motivations differ by gender, with men searching for more sex or attention, and women looking to fill an emotional void.

产生不忠行为的原因有很多，比如说报复，无聊，性的新鲜感所带来的刺激，性成瘾等。但专家认为大多数时候，不忠行为的动机因男女而有差异，男人更多的是寻求性或者关注，而女人是为了填补情感的空虚。

"Women tell me, 'I was lonely, not connected, I don't feel close to my partner, and I was taken for granted,'" says Winifred Reilly, MA, MFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Berkeley, Calif. "They say they wanted to have someone who would look into their eyes and make them feel sexy again."

加利福尼亚州伯克利市的一位有执照的婚姻家庭方面的临床医师,威妮弗蕾德 蕾利说，女人们总是告诉我说：我很孤单，没有朋友，和爱人也非常冷淡，总是被对方熟视无睹。她们想要有人能直视她们的眼睛，重新唤起她们的激情。

Emotional Reasons
情绪上的原因

Every affair is different, and so are every woman's reasons for her involvement.

每一场外遇都是不同的，女人们的理由也各不相同。

That said, men are more likely to cite sexual motivations for infidelity and are less likely to fall in love with an extramarital partner, says Helen Fisher, PhD, a biological anthropologist at Rutgers University and the author of Why Him? Why Her? and Why We Love.

罗格斯大学的人类学家海伦 费舍尔博士，着有《他？她？我们为什么相爱》一书，她说，男人更倾向于把性作为不忠行为的动机，并且较少会与婚外情的另一半真的坠入爱河。

Women tend to have an emotional connection with their lover and are more likely to have an affair because of loneliness, Fisher says.

而女人们总是试图和自己的爱人建立情感上的联系，她们更容易因为孤单而有外遇。

"Women tend to be more unhappy with the relationship they are in ... while men can be a lot happier in their primary relationship and also cheat," Fisher tells WebMD. "Women are more interested in supplementing their marriage or jumping ship than men are -- for men, it is a secondary strategy as opposed to an alternate.".

女人更容易对自己所处的关系不满，而男人却能更快乐，也会存在欺骗行为。费舍尔说，女人比男人更倾向于填补她们的婚姻或者干脆跳脱出去，而对于男人们来说，这样的行为不是他们的首选。

In one of her studies, Fisher found that 34% of women who had affairs were happy or very happy in their marriage. A greater percentage of men who had affairs, 56%, were happy in their marriage.

据费舍尔的一项研究表明，有外遇的女人中，34%在婚姻中都很快乐或者非常快乐。而与之对应的男人比例要更高，达到56%。