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总是一个人?孤单时你可以做的9件事

2014-01-09来源:lifehack
6. Try nurturing others
尝试关怀他人

Caring for others matters, even when it’s only done in small ways. Reading to the elderly or being a child or teen mentor is excellent for not only curing your own loneliness, but someone else’s as well. Visiting, conversing with, or reading to the elderly makes them feel more connected and useful, especially if they live in an assisted-care facility.
去关心他人的事情,哪怕只是以细微的方式。为老人读书、做小孩或青少年指导员不仅能治愈你自己的孤独感,还能帮助到他人。看望老人、和老人交谈或为老人读书,能让他们感到自己不孤单、还有价值——尤其是当这些老人住在养老院的情况下。

Serving as a child or teen mentor can help you pass on knowledge and information to the next generation, whether it’s practical advice and skills such as how to work a polynomial equation, or giving them life lessons like how to get over a broken heart or dealing with indifferent or unfriendly peers and authority figures. By caring for others, you can also care for yourself by showing you have something of value to contribute to your world and the people in it.
做小孩或青少年指导员能帮你把知识与信息教授给下一代——不论那是诸如怎样解多项式方程的实际建议和技能,还是像如何度过伤心时刻或怎样面对冷漠不友好的同伴上级等人生教诲。关心他人的同时,你也在关心自己,表明自己有价值能够为社会和他人做贡献。

7. Get a pet
养一只宠物

A fuzzy animal like a cat, dog, or even a ferret makes a great companion and confers health benefits. Studies indicate that simply petting an animal reduces blood pressure, anxiety, and may actually be an effective non-medical treatment for certain forms of depression. In addition, the playful antics of a puppy or kitten and the joy of training them to perform various tricks and tasks more than makes up for any inconvenience they may cause while housebreaking.
小猫小狗或雪貂这种毛茸茸的动物都是不错的伙伴,对人的健康很有好处。研究表明,抚摸动物能降低血压和焦虑,是治愈某些抑郁症状有效的非药物疗法。而且,小狗小猫憨态可掬,训练它们应对入室盗贼的各种把戏或任务也充满乐趣,这些足以让饲养它们而造成的种种不便可以忽略不计了。

If possible, choose a pet from the vast number of rescue animals in shelters around the world. You may just save a life, making you feel even happier about your choice and winning you a loyal companion you’re sure to cherish.
如果可以,就从世界各地的各大动物收容所中挑一只宠物吧。你不仅救了一条生命,还会为自己的选择而感到开心,并且又赢得了一个值得珍惜的忠诚伙伴。

8. Try to figure out what’s missing
弄明白错失了什么

The state of being alone simply means no one else is with you. Loneliness, especially when it’s a persistent state, is a warning sign that something essential is absent from your life. The first step to curing the problem is to figure out what’s missing. Do you isolate yourself, by accident or design? Do you work in a career that doesn’t allow for much one-on-one human interaction? Do you have any friends, family, or loved ones you can talk to?
孤单只表明你身边没伴儿。孤独,尤其是状态持续很久的话,就说明你的生活缺少某些基本的东西了。解决问题的第一步就是想清楚到底错失了什么。你是故意让自己离群索居的吗?你的工作环境不容许面对面交流吗?你有没有可以倾诉的亲朋好友或至爱?

If the answer to any of these is negative, it’s time to take positive steps to correct that. Join a dating site. Get the contact information for your cousin you haven’t talked to since adolescence. Ask that server at the local diner if she’s free for dinner one night. Even if the answer is no, you’re taking positive steps to alleviate your loneliness.
如果以上问题的答案都比较消极,那你得采取积极行动进行改正了。注册一个约会网站吧。想办法联系自从长大后就没讲过话的表亲吧。问问附近餐厅的服务员今晚有没有空一起吃个饭吧。就算被拒绝,至少你也在积极克服孤独了。

9. Is something making you lonely
是不是某件事让你感到孤独

Introverts like their own company, but it’s easy to get too much of it. When this happens, ask yourself what’s changed. Are you with someone who makes you feel lonely even when they’re right next to you? Are you in a new town, job, or living space? Do your surroundings or routines feel stale and overdone? What’s making you unhappy with the situation?
内向的人喜欢独处,但总是一个人也不太好。如果孤独来袭,请问问自己发生了怎样的变化。是不是某些人明明就在身边却还是让你感到孤独呢?你搬到了新城市、换了新工作或住处?是周围环境或日常琐事让你觉得索然无味而难以承受吗?这种情况下是什么让你觉得不快乐?

In some cases, people feel lonely because something is missing. In others, people feel lonely because something needs to be subtracted. This can be harder to identify, because we always try to hold on to the things we believe make us happy and define us. A big part of overcoming loneliness is defining oneself on one’s own terms.
有时候,人们感到孤独是因为失去了某些东西;有时候,人们感到孤独是因为需要精简掉某些东西。这很难定义,因为人们总是试图紧紧抓住自认为能够让自己开心并定义自己的东西,而战胜孤独很大程度上需要用自己的方式去定义自己。