教育界: 虎妈和伊顿公学的启示

I’ve never met David Cameron. But I know Archbishop Justin Welby and Mayor Boris Johnson well enough to guess that neither is a stranger to insecurity. Both, too, have the capacity to work like dogs.
我从没与戴维•卡梅伦(David Cameron)打过交道。不过，我对贾斯汀•韦尔比(Justin Welby)大主教和鲍里斯•约翰逊(Boris Johnson)市长有足够的了解。我完全能想象得到，他俩对于不安全感都不陌生。同样，他俩都有约束自己勤恳工作的能力。

The triple package helps make sense of other success theories. We are endlessly told how many dyslexics and people who lost a parent young make it to the top. Now we know the reason: such things make them insecure. We also now know for the deprivation to work, the bereaved dyslexic must also know he’s great, and be prepared to do the necessary to become greater.
这三大法宝还有助于解释其它成功学理论。我们总会听到许多失读症患者和幼年丧父者如何攀上人生顶峰的成功故事。如今，我们终于明白了他们成功的原因：这是由于那些缺陷令他们缺乏安全感。我们还明白，要让这类缺陷发挥作用，拥有该缺陷的失读症患者还必须对自己的优秀心知肚明，必须做好准备通过必要的努力使自己更优秀。

One cheering thing about the theory is it has no time for passion – which has never struck me as either a necessary or a sufficient condition of great achievement. Nor is there any mention of other traits so often invoked including optimism, networking, resilience or life-long learning. From the triple package theory all other characteristics will flow, as needed.
该理论一个振奋人心的地方在于，它对“激情”只字未提——对我来说，激情既不是伟大成就的必要条件，也不是充分条件。另外，对于人们常常提及的乐观、人脉、韧性或终身学习之类的品质，该书也丝毫没有提及。根据三大法宝的理论，所有其它品质在必要时会自然涌现出来。

Less cheering is that it explains why the successful are seldom good eggs. Superior people are alienating; insecure people are exhausting. People who are both are doubly unbearable, especially when you take into account all the dissembling they usually do to mask both traits. And too much discipline is a dull trait in a friend as it means it is impossible to get them to down tools and open a bottle of wine instead.
相对来说，让人不那么振奋的一点是，该理论解释了为什么成功人士很少是讨人喜欢的人。有优越感的人会令他人敬而远之，没有安全感的人则会让他人失去耐性。这两者兼而有之的人则更加令人难以忍受。如果考虑他们通常会为掩饰这两种品质而做出的种种举动，情况就更是如此了。而过于自律对朋友来说又太过沉闷，因为这意味着不可能让他停下工作，开瓶葡萄酒享受一下。

Yet as a parent I extract a shred of comfort from The Triple Package. Chua’s first book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, upset liberal mothers everywhere, making us feel uneasy about being such softies with our children. This time, I feel slightly let off the hook. Surely anything I do to try to increase my children’s superiority will lessen their feeling of inadequacy. While if I try to make them more insecure, I’ll risk denting their superiority. So the lesson I choose to extract is to muddle through, exactly as before.
不过，身为人母，我却从《成功三法宝》中得到一丝安慰。蔡美儿第一本书《虎妈战歌》(Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother)曾让各地的宽容妈妈十分不安，使我们为曾经这么软弱地对待子女感到忧虑。而这一次我感到一丝解脱。诚然，我所做的任何提升孩子们优越感的举动都会削弱他们对自身不足的感觉能力。然而，如果我试图降低他们的安全感，就有可能伤害到他们的优越感。因此，我从这本书中吸取的教训是：就像过去那样，胡乱应付就行了。