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爱担心VS.乐天派:忧虑来袭时,教你11招
相信自己:发生任何事情,都能应对
"People with high worry not only generate ideas about what could go wrong, they also lack confidence in their ability to cope with what could go wrong," Purdon explains, adding that this is ironic considering worriers actually perform quite well in a crisis since they've spent so much time thinking about the worst-case scenarios and have normal coping abilities. Non-worriers, on the other hand, possess the confidence that if something were to happen, they'll just ... handle it.
“容易忧虑的人不但会有各种想法认为事情会出错,而且缺乏对自己应对能力的自信,” 博登也同时讲到,由于忧虑者其实能够很好地处理危机,这一点是有些讽刺的,因为他们早已花了很多时间去设想最坏的可能并且有了正常的应对能力。从另一个方面来讲,乐天派自信地认为如果有事情发生,他们只需要……处理它。
They have the ability to see positive outcomes in seemingly bleak situations
即便事实黯淡,也能看到积极的结果
Take the graphic image Moser used in his Journal of Abnormal Psychology study, described earlier. If you were to look at an image of a woman being held at knifepoint by a masked man, what do you think the next immediate outcome would be? A worrier would likely only think of the worst-case scenario, while a non-worrier would have the capacity to think, "That woman is in distress, but maybe she breaks away from her assailant and runs to safety," Moser explains. Non-worriers are able to see that there could be a positive outcome to a negative event.
想想之前提到的莫泽博士在《变态心理学杂志》上发表的研究中用过的图片。如果你看到图片上一个女子被蒙面汉用刀指着喉咙,你认为紧接着的结果会是什么?忧虑者很有可能只会想到最坏的情形,然而乐天派的人会有大脑容量去思考,“那个女子处于危难之中,但也许她能够从蒙面汉手中逃脱,跑到安全的地方,”莫泽博士解释道。乐天派的人有能力从负面的事情中看到积极的结果。
They ask themselves the right questions
问自己三个问题
Worriers who are trying to tamp down on their worrying tendencies could find it useful to ask themselves a series of questions when they're going down a negative path. "Ask, 'Is it my problem?" And secondly, 'Do I have any control over it?'" Purdon says. "Thirdly, the next question people can ask themselves is, 'Have I already done everything about it that I can? And is it imminent?' If it's not imminent, then there's no reason to worry about it now."
想要平息忧虑?当陷入负面情绪时问自己一系列问题:“提问,‘是我的问题么?”第二个问题,“我有办法控制它么?’” 博登说道,“第三个问题,‘我已经做到所有自己能做的了么?这事紧迫么?’如果不急,就没有理由现在去担心啊。”
They know how to perceive their negative emotions
正确对待负面情绪
"The most severe chronic worriers [are] less accepting of their emotions, which means they're intolerant of uncertainty and also find negative emotions in particular to not be very acceptable," Moser explains. Meanwhile, people who have a healthier psychological outlook tend to look at negative emotions as a sign that whatever is causing those emotions -- whether it be relationships, or work, or bills -- needs attention. They use emotions to make informed decisions.
“症状最严重的慢性忧虑者很难接受自己的情绪,就是说他们无法容忍不确定性,尤其很难接受负面的情绪,” 莫泽解释道。然而,在心理观念健康的人们看来,负面情绪只是一种征兆,表明引发这些情绪的根源——无论是人际关系,工作或者账单——需要注意而已。他们会利用自己的情绪全面地做出决定。