懂得拒绝：珍视自我价值 学会适时说不

The Guy You Want to Date says, "Let's hang Saturday." At 1 a.m., he finally texts, indicating his interest in, ahem, hanging. Nuh-uh.
你心仪的男神说：“周六一起出去吧。”结果到半夜1点，他终于来短信，暗示他想的……咳咳……不止是出去而已。

Text, "No thanks." Wait a beat. Then, "But dinner Wednesday?" If you want more, don't take less for fear he'll disappear. Forget about jumping like it's the president calling! You'll save yourself months of pain by being clear with him and sticking to your decision.
短信回复：”还是不了，谢谢。“等一下，再接着回：”周三一起吃晚饭怎么样？“如果你想要他全心全意，就不能因为害怕失去他而委曲求全。千万不要高兴得跳起来，好像是总统给你打的电话。和他说清楚，并且坚持你的想法，这会使自己免受数月的煎熬。

4. The Weekend-Work No
对周末加班说不

Your boss asks you to work on Saturday, but your cousin is getting married.
上司让你周六加班，但是你的表亲这周结婚。

"I would love to work on that with you, but I have a big family event. What if I stayed late Friday night?" Apologizing or going into an absurd amount of detail seems weak. Be calm and make eye contact and she'll respect what you're saying. Then follow up with an alternative solution if you can, so everyone wins.”我很想跟着你加班，但是我这周家里有件大事。不如我周五加个晚班怎样？“道歉或者解释一大堆荒唐的细枝末节显得太无力。冷静地采用眼神交流，她会尊重你的决定。接着，如果可以的话，提出一个变通的方案，这样就能双赢了。

5. The Kickstarter No
对筹资活动说不

Your friend has a great idea for a vegan-snack-sample-delivery business, but you do not have thedough.
你的朋友想办一个素食小点心的派送活动，但你并没有这个闲钱。

"I just gave to another friend's charity race, so I'm tapped out. Can I help by making an intro for you instead?" Little white lies can be okay. You don't have to share details about your finances with friends. Value the work you did to earn your money, and donate only to causes that move you.
“我刚刚捐助了另一位朋友的慈善活动，现在手头有点紧。不如我帮你宣传一下？”小小的善意谎言没有多大问题。你并不需要和朋友公开经济状况的细节。珍惜你辛苦工作挣得的钱，捐助给真正打动你的那些活动。