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纽约人的日常对话:原来你们是这样的社会人!

2018-05-08来源:和谐英语

While listening in on strangers conversations should still be considered rude and intrusive, sometimes you can't help but pick up a juicy snippet of gossip, completely out of context, that is just comedy gold.
偷听陌生人说话会被认为是粗鲁,侵犯性的行为,尽管如此,有时候你还是会情不自禁地想收集点八卦的好材料,发现自己没头没尾的听到了非常经典的笑料。

People are taking to Twitter in their thousands to document these random overheard conversations, and while this may suck in terms of our privacy when out among strangers, its certainly good for a laugh on the internet!
网友们在社交网上分享了数千条消息,共同记录下这些偶然中听到的段子。虽然这可能有点儿不利于维护隐私权,但对其他人来说,在网上看到这些段子,一定会开怀大笑一番。

Scroll down below to check out some of the best, compiled in a list. And don't forget to vote for your favorites!
往下翻,看看这张精选的最佳段子清单。别忘了给你最喜欢的一个投票哟。

1.Overheard 15 year old niece fighting with her friend: you think I can’t live without you? Who do you think you are? My phone charger?
偶然听到我15岁的侄女跟朋友吵架,你以为我没了你就不行吗?你以为你是谁?我的充电器?

2.I was at a  party and a drunk girl passed me on herphone, crying, “I’m trying to find Marco, but people keep yeling back Polo…”
我在一个趴体上,一个喝醉酒的女孩让我接电话:“我想找到马可,可是总有人对我喊波罗。”

3.Overheard at a gas station:
偶然在加油站听到:
Clerk 1: Janet workedlast night, didn’t she?
员工甲:昨天晚上是Janet值班,对不对?
Clerk 2: yeah why?
员工乙:是呀,怎么了?
Clerk 1: The candy is organized by color again.
员工甲:糖果又是按颜色分类放的。
Clerk 2: Dammit Janet.
员工乙:该死的Janet。
 

4.“See young people do taichi !”
“看,有年轻人在打太极拳!”
“No Mom, I think she’s looking for a wifi signal.”
“不,妈妈,我觉得她是在找无线网络信号。”
 

5.Today my wife was at Costco when she overheard a conversation between a 70-something white man and a 40-something Asian man.
今天我的妻子去好市多量贩店,她偶然听到两人的对话,对话双方是一个70多岁的白种人和一个40多岁的亚洲人。
The converstaion went as follows, and has us both disgusted but also cheering:
对话是这样的,我们听着有点儿反感,但同时又觉得有点欣慰。
Older White Man: Do you know of any good Chinese restaurant?
白种人老爷爷:你知道什么好的中餐厅吗?
Asian Man: I’m not sure, maybe Jingdu.( local restaurant )
亚洲男人:我不太确定,京都饭店还行吧。
Older White Man: Do you work there?
白种人老爷爷:你在那儿工作吗?
Asian Man: No sir, I do not.
亚洲男人:不,先生,我不在那儿上班。
Older White Man: No? Do you even know who our President is ?
白种人老爷爷:不在那儿上班?你知道我们的总统是谁吗?
Asian Man:亚洲男人:Yes sir, I sure do(slightly chuckle)
是的,先生,我当然知道。(干笑)
Older White Man: Sure, you do…what, do you even do for work then?
白种人老爷爷:哦,你当然知道。那你到底是干什么活计的呢?
Asian Man: Sir, I am a cardiac surgeon in the emergency room. Why do you ask?
亚洲男人:我是急诊室里的心脏外科手术医生。你这么问是什么意思?
Older White Man:Eyes widen and he walks away.
白种人老爷爷:(瞪大眼睛走开了。)
 

6.I once overheard two old Latinas at the store saying how they wanted to grab a man’s butt. O speak Spanish. It was mu butt.
听到商店里两个拉丁裔的老年人说他们想要抓一个男人的屁股。我说的是西班牙语。他们是说我的屁股。
 

7.Overheard a trainer at the gym this moring: “honey listen. Life does’t get better. You get better.” Oh how much I love that.
早上听到健身房里的陪练这样说:“听着甜心,生活不会变的更好,但你可以变的更好。”我真喜欢这句话。
 

8.Overheard from child on playground:”I’m sad. Wait. There’s nothing to be sad about. Okay, I’mhappy!”
偶然听到游乐场上的孩子这样说道:“我很难过。等等,好像没什么事可难过的。好吧,我很开心!”
 

9.Actual I quote I overheard my 7 year old daughter say when she met someone at the park today. “I’m Isabella. I’m good at gymnastics and fighting to the death.”
真人真事。我7岁的女儿今天早上在公园里和别人打招呼时这样说道:“我叫Isabella,我擅长体操,还擅长战死沙场。”
 

10.I once overheard the cop who pulled me over whisper into his radio:” not our guy.  This one’s got pants”
一个交警让我停在路边,我听到他对对讲机里说:“不是我们要找的人。这个人穿了裤子。”