正文
研究发现 很多人是怕对方痛苦才不敢分手
A surprising new study has found that a person is more likely to stay in a relationship if they think leaving would harm their partner.
一项令人惊讶的新研究发现,如果一个人认为分手会伤害自己的伴侣,那么他很可能会继续维持这段感情。
Previous research has found that couples end up staying in relationships because they lack better dating options, or they feel like they've invested too much time and money into their partner to break up.
之前的研究发现,情侣们会因为缺乏更好的约会对象,或者他们觉得自己已经在对方身上投入了太多的时间和金钱,从而舍不得分手,最终保持恋爱关系。
But Samantha Joel, a psychology professor at the University of Utah and author of the study, told The Post that according to her research, most people stay in relationships for selfless reasons.
但这项研究的作者、犹他大学的心理学教授萨曼莎·乔尔向《华盛顿邮报》透露,根据她的研究,大多数人保持恋爱关系是出于无私的原因。
"This is true even for people who weren't really committed to the relationship themselves or who were personally unsatisfied with the relationship. Generally, we don't want to hurt our partners and we care about what they want."
“这是真的,即使人们并没有真的努力在维持这段感情,或者他们个人对这段关系不太满意。一般来说,我们不想伤害我们的伴侣,并且总是关心他们最想要的是什么。”
Researchers interviewed 500 people who were in new relationships and were thinking about breaking up.
研究人员采访了500名处于新恋情中但正考虑分手的人。
Over the course of two months, the participants were asked about their rationale for sticking around. The study found that people who thought their partners were highly committed were less likely to initiate a breakup.
在两个月的时间里,研究人员询问了参与者没有分手的理由。研究发现,那些认为对方非常忠诚的人不太可能主动提分手。
"So those people who are concerned about their partners have a really adaptive that work in an ongoing healthy relationship, but it might also trap people who are in unhappy relationships," Joel said. "It's a double-edged sword. People are inherently pro-social, and they care about their partner's feelings."
乔尔说:“所以那些在乎伴侣的人有一种很好的适应能力,这种适应能力在一段健康的关系中起作用,但也会让那些感情不好的人陷入困境。这就像是一把双刃剑。人是天生亲社会的,他们关心伴侣的感受。”
But she also questions people who stay in these types of relationships. "Who wants a partner who doesn't really want to be in the relationship?"
但她也质疑那些保持这种关系的人。“谁想要一个心已经不在这段感情里的伴侣?”