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为什么我的议论文写作得不到高分?

2012-06-29来源:和谐英语

  多年的教学中,笔者批改了数以千计的议论文。从中发现,大部分中国考生在写议论文时的失分点实在可惜,因此,雅思专家总结和归纳了目前考生在写议论中的十大失分点,希望考生们在备考时予以重视。
  一、不一致
  所谓不一致不光指主谓不一致,还包括了数的不一致、时态不一致以及代词不一致等。
  比如:When one have money, he can do what he want to.
  分析:one是第三人称单数,因此本句的have应改为has; want应改为wants, 本句是典型的主谓不一致。
  改为:When one has money, he can do what he wants (to do).
  二、修饰语错位
  英语与汉语不同,同一个修饰语置于句子不同的位置,句子的含义可能引起变化。对于这一点考生们往往没有引起足够的重视,因而造成了不必要的误解。
  比如:
  I believe I can do it well and I will better know the world outside the campus.
  分析:better位置不当,应置于句末。
  三、句子不完整
  在口语中,交际双方可借助手势语气上下文等,不完整的句子完全可以被理解。可是书面语就不同了,句子结构不完整会令意思表达不清,这种情况常常在主句写完以后,作者又想加些补充说明时发生。
  比如:There are many ways to know the society. for example by TV, radio, newspaper and so on.
  分析:本句后半部分”for example by TV, radio, newspaper and so on.”不是一个完整的句子,仅为一些不连贯的词语,不能独立成句。
  改为:There are many ways to know society, for example, by TV, radio, and newspaper.
  四、悬垂修饰语
  所谓悬垂修饰语是指句首的短语与后面句子的逻辑关系混乱不清。
  比如:at the age of ten, my grandfather died. 这句中”at the age of ten”只写出十岁时,但没有说明“谁”十岁时,按一般推理不可能是my grandfather, 如果我们把这个悬垂修饰语改得明确一点,读者或考官在读句子时就不会误解了。
  改为:When I was ten, my grandfather died.
  To do well in college, good grades are essential.
  分析:句中不定式短语“to do well in college”的逻辑主语不清楚。
  改为:To do well in college, a student needs good grades.
  五、词性误用
  “词性误用”常表现为:介词当动词用;形容词当副词用;名词当动词用等。这一点是目前考生最容易出错的地方。
  比如:None can negative the importance of money.
  分析:negative系形容词,误作动词。
  改为:None can deny the importance of money.
  六、指代不清
  指代不清主要讲的是代词与被指代的人或物关系不清,或者先后所用的代词不一致。
  比如:Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted her to be her bridesmaid.
  读完上面这一句话,读者无法明确地判断两位姑娘中谁将结婚,谁将当伴娘。如果我们把易于引起误解的代词所指代的对象加以明确,意思就一目了然了。这个句子可改为:
  Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted my sister to be her bridesmaid.
  比如:We can also know the society by serving it yourself.
  分析:句中人称代词we和反身代词yourself指代不一致。
  改为:We can also know society by serving it ourselves.
  七、不间断句子
  这个错误的出现受中文意识的影响很大。很多考生在写句子时,句子之间缺乏有效的连接成分。甚至,有的句子写的比较中式化。
  比如:There are many ways we get to know the outside world.
  分析:这个句子包含了两层完整的意思:“there are many ways”以及“we get to know the outside world”。简单地把它们连在一起就不妥当了。
  改为:
  There are many ways for us to learn about the outside world. 或:
  There are many ways through which we can become acquainted with the outside world.
  八、措词毛病
  学生在写作中没有养成良好的推敲,斟酌句子中所选用词的习惯。大部分考生随心所欲,拿来就用,所以作文中用词不当的错误随处可见。
  比如:The increasing use of chemical obstacles in agriculture also makes pollution.
  分析:显然,考生把obstacles“障碍”,“障碍物”误作substance“物质”了。另外“the increasing use(不断增加的使用)”应改为“abusive use(滥用)”。
  改为:The abusive use of chemical substances in agriculture also causes/leads to pollution.
  九、累赘
  写句子没有一个多余的词;写段落没有一个无必要的句子。能用单词的不用词组;能用词组的不用从句或句子。
  比如:In spite of the fact that he is lazy, I like him.
  本句的“the fact that he is lazy”系同谓语从句,我们按照上述“能用词组的不用从句”可以改为:In spite of his laziness, I like him.
  比如:For the people who are diligent and kind, money is just the thing to be used to buy the thing they need.
  整个句子可以大大简化为:
  Diligent people use money only to buy what they need.
  十、不连贯
  不连贯是指一个句子前言不对后语,或是结构上不畅通,这也是考生常犯的毛病。
  比如:The fresh water, it is the most important things of the earth.
  分析:the fresh water与逗号后的it不连贯,it与things在数方面不一致。