如何改好雅思的低分作文

　　相信谙熟雅思写作考试的烤鸭对于考官给出的高分甚至满分的范文已经非常熟悉了，那么试试看

　　自己动手改造那些低分的范文，可以加深对评分标准的理解，尤其是一些扣分点。也许有些扣分点正是你曾经难以逾越的鸿沟，那么现在让我们一起战胜扣分阴影。

　　以C4T4综合类小作文为例：

　　You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

　　The charts below give information about travel to and from the UK, andabout the most

　　popular countries for UK residents to visit.

　　Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, andmake

　　comparisons where relevant.

　　Write at least 150 words.

　　Band 5考官评语

　　The response is under-length (138 words). The candidate reports the keyinformation in the first graph i.e. that visits to and from the UK increased andthat the increase in visits from the UK was more marked than that of visits tothe country. In the bar chart the information is also reported accurately.However, the references to are confusing to & dollar, suggesting that thecandidate has not fully understood the information given, and there is littleattempt to relate the two diagrams or to make comparisons across the informationgiven.

　　There is a brief introduction to the topic, with and attempt to paraphrasethe rubric; the overall reference, however, resulting in a considerable amountof repetition of key vocabulary.

　　There is a fairly narrow range of sentence types and errors occur in verbformation and in the use of tense.

　　简单总结下来该文章扣分的主要原因：

　　1. 字数不够

　　2. 信息点和信息之间的连接不准确，因为没看懂图表

　　3. 另个图的对比不够充分

　　4. 重复次数过多

　　5. 句式缺乏多样性，语法错误多

　　升级版范文：

　　A line graph, combined with a bar chart, shows us statistical informationregarding the number of people traveling to or from Britain during 1979 and 1999as well as the popularity of 5 different destinations for the Britishrespectively.

　　In 1979, the amount of travelers both to and from the UK start similarlyaround 10 million, and show a steady increase to 15 and 20 million separately inapproximately 1986. From then on, however, visits abroad by UK residents go updramatically, reaching 52 million in 1999 while the figure of foreigners comingto the United Kingdom rise continuously but less significantly, ending at about28 million.

　　France is the most attractive place for British citizens with as many as 11million visitors in the single year of 1999, followed by Spain that attractsalmost 10 million people. In contrast, less UK residents choose to go overseasto America, Greece and Turkey by only 4, 3 and 2 millions respectively in thegiven year.

　　Overall, although a growing number of people come to UK or leave it forother places, a greater amount of British people tend to travel abroad. Inaddition, they prefer relatively nearer destinations like France and Spain toAmerica, Greece and Turkey. ( 206 words)

　　有精力复习或者想冲高分的烤鸭们，别再犹豫了，自己也动动手，给低分范文一个逆袭的机会!