正文

求爱过程越长感情质量越高

2010-08-24来源:和谐英语

Couples who get to know each other before being intimate have a better chance of having a lasting relationship, but in some cases even a casual fling can lead to true love, according to a new research.

Most of the 56 percent of 642 adults questioned in the study who said they had waited until they got serious before they had sex reported having a high quality relationship.

The number was higher than for the 27 percent of people who had sex while dating casually and the 17 percent who were intimate while in a non-romantic relationship.

"There's something about the characteristics of people who wait before sex that is linked to higher-quality relationships," said sociology professor Anthony Paik of the University of Iowa.

Paik, who reported the findings in the journal Social Science Research, said the research suggests that the courtship process acts as a screening mechanism.

"The debate is 'why can't we have sex now?' The expectation is that sex should occur very quickly. But doing so, you're losing out on some information that might be useful," he explained in an interview.

It's almost an economic equation, he added.

"On average, the more costly the process leading into the relationship, the more likely it is to work. That's what the data would suggest."

But Paik said the findings did not show that an early sexual relationship had a direct negative impact on relationships.

When he filtered out people who said they had frequent non-romantic or casual dating sexual relationships he found that the gap in relationship quality between serious and nonserious contexts of sexual activity disappeared.

"It means it's possible for two strangers to lock eyes in a bar, and go home together, and actually end up in a long-term relationship," Paik said.

一项最新调查表明，在确定亲密关系之前彼此互相了解的情侣感情更有可能长久，但在某些情况下，一夜情也能带来真爱。

在接受调查的642名成年人中，56%的人称他们在两人确立恋爱关系后才发生性关系，这其中的大部分人称自己的感情质量较高。

另外有27%的人称他们在约会期间就随意发生了性关系，17%的人在发生关系时与对方还不是恋人关系，在这两种情况下，报告感情质量高的人的比例都不如前者高。

艾奥瓦大学的社会学教授安东尼．帕伊克说：“在发生性关系前耐心等待的人有一些特点，这些特点与高质量的恋爱关系有关。”

这一在《社会科学研究》期刊上发表的研究结果称，该研究表明求爱的过程发挥了筛选机制的作用。

他在一个采访中解释说：“问题的焦点是‘为什么我们现在不能做爱？’。人们期望性行为会很快发生。但如果这么做，你就失去了一些可能有用的信息。”

他说，这相当于一个经济学方程式。

“一般来说，确立恋爱关系的成本越高，其运转良好的可能性越大。这是调查数据告诉我们的。”

但帕伊克称，调查结果并没有显示过早发生性行为对感情有直接的负面影响。

帕伊克将在非恋爱关系时频繁发生性关系和和随意约会期间发生性关系的人单拿出来进行分析后发现，无论是在认真还是不认真的关系状况下发生性关系，这两种情况下的感情质量没有太大差别。

帕伊克说：“这意味着，两个陌生人在酒吧相遇，相互吸引，然后一起回家，最终成眷属的可能性还是存在的。”