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学学奥巴马的美国式幽默

2009-05-11来源:和谐英语

周六晚上,奥巴马参加了一年一度的白宫记者协会晚宴,秉承历届总统的传统,既嘲弄他人,也拿自己开涮,尽显美国式幽默。要说搞笑,奥巴马知道自己比不上前任小布什,所以他先声明:

I must confess I really did not want to be here tonight. But I knew I had to come. That's one more problem that I inherited from George W. Bush.(我必须承认,今晚我其实不怎么想来这里。但是我知道我不得不来,这是我从乔治·W·布什那里继承下来的麻烦之一。)

说到麻烦,最近美国总统空军一号和一架护航战机在纽约市曼哈顿区低飞拍照引起市民恐慌,奥巴马就此开玩笑,把飞机低飞归咎于他的两个女儿调皮捣蛋:

Sasha and Malia aren't here tonight because they're grounded. You can't just take Air Force One on a joy ride to Manhattan. I don't care whose kids you are(沙沙和玛丽亚今晚没有来,因为她们已经被就地停飞了。谁都不能把"空军一号"当成飞车游戏在曼哈顿来玩,我可不管他们是谁家的孩子)

说完了自己的孩子,奥巴马又提起希拉里·克林顿的墨西哥之行,拿猪流感开玩笑:

The second she got back from Mexico, she pulled me into a hug and gave me a big kiss and told me I better get down there myself.(她刚刚从墨西哥回来,就给我一个拥抱和一个大吻,还告诉我说最好最好亲自去那里一趟)。

下一个调侃的对象是美国前副总统切尼,曾在2006年一次打猎中开枪误伤朋友,他当时以为打中一只鹌鹑。此外,在副总统任内,切尼还提倡在审问恐怖嫌疑人时对犯人用刑。关于打猎误伤朋友的事,布什总统当年在参加记者协会晚宴上已经调侃过一次,当时他指出,“副总统的全名是理查德·B·切尼(Richard B. Cheney),而B代表靶心。仁慈的上帝啊,你早就料到他会开枪击中某个人或什么东西”。当时连切尼夫人对老公也不放过,她在发言中抱怨说,因为她来晚了,所以“打猎的笑话已经被别人用了”。这次奥巴马还是旧事重提:

Dick Cheney was supposed to be here, but he is very busy working on his memoirs, tentatively titled, 'How to Shoot Friends and Interrogate People(迪克·切尼本该来这里,可是正忙着写他的回忆录呢。而这本书的名子打算取名为:如何枪击朋友和审问他人)。

奥巴马还提到了众议院少数党领袖John Boehner,他肤色黝黑,但其实不是非洲裔:

We have a lot in common: He is a person of color, although not a color that appears in the natural world(我们有许多共同点:他是一个有色人,但是他的颜色不是自然世界中的一种)。

奥巴马没有忘记第二天是母亲节,他拿白宫办公厅主任Rahm Emanuel打趣:

This is a tough holiday for Rahm. He's not used to saying the word 'day' after 'mother'(对Raham来说,这是一个艰难的日子。他不习惯在“母亲”这个词后面加一个“节”字)

当然,就职百日乏善可陈的奥巴马也要自嘲一番,谈起未来百日的宏图大计:

During the second 100 days, we will design, build and open a library dedicated to my first 100 days. I believe my next hundred days will be so successful that I will be able to complete them in 72 days," he said to a roar of laughter. "And on my 73rd day, I will rest(在第二个百日内,我们将设计、修建一座专门用来纪念入主白宫100天的图书馆。我相信,我的第二个百日也会异常出色,以至我在72天内就可完事。因此,从第73天起,我就可以退休了)

说了这么多笑话,他最后转向记者所说的一番严肃的结束语让人们听起来都不知道是真还是假了:

A government without newspapers, a government without a tough and vibrant media of all sorts is not an option for the United States of America… We look to you for truth, even if it's always approximation(一个没有报纸的政府,一个没有严厉、富有活力的各种媒体的政府不是美利坚合众国的选项…我们期待你们实事求是的报道,即便是事实的近似值也罢)。