备考辅导：SAT优秀作文欣赏（7）

　　Score Explanation SAT写作6分范文点评

　　This outstanding essay insightfully and effectively develops the point of view that “What makes our lives easier does not necessarily make them better.” The writer demonstrates outstanding critical thinking by focusing on clearly appropriate examples throughout history to support the idea that not all of mankind’s “advancements” to make life easier have been “beneficial.” The essay begins by describing the ancient scholars who, “without the technology and ease of life we have today, were able to produce some of the most prolific additions to human knowledge ever.” The writer continues by offering the idea that today, due to the incredible advancements in technology, “Very very few men . . . are leaders in more than one discipline.” The essay concludes with the idea that, due to the distractions and ease of a technologically advanced society, “Man has become less productive and less devoted.” This well organized and clearly focused essay demonstrates coherence and progression of ideas. The essay consistently exhibits skillful use of language and demonstrates meaningful variety in sentence structure (“Bill Gates, while adding immensely to the pleasures and ease of man’s life, did so only by forcefully destroying many fledgling companies and completely undermining our capitalistic marketplace. Very very few men in our time are leaders in more than one discipline”). This essay demonstrates clear and consistent mastery and is scored 6.