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冲击波英语专八翻译之汉译英--文学类(3)

2012-12-25来源:互联网

窗子许里面人看出去,同时也许外面人看进来,所以在热闹地方住的人要用窗帘子,替他们私生活做个保障。晚上访人,只要看窗里有无灯光,就约略可以清楚主人在不在家,不必打开了门再问,好比不等人开口,从眼睛里看出他的心思。关窗的作用等于闭眼。天地间有许多景象是要闭了眼才看得见的,譬如梦。假使窗外的人声物态太嘈杂了,关了窗好让灵魂自由地去探胜,安静地默想。有时,关窗和闭眼也有连带关系,你觉得窗外的世界不过尔尔,并不能给予你什么满足,你想回到故乡,你要看见跟你分离的亲友,你只有睡觉,闭了眼向梦里寻去,于是你起来先关了窗。因为只是春天,还留着残冷,窗子也不能整天整夜不关的。

背景介绍

《窗》是钱钟书(1910~1998)散文集《写在人生边上》中的一篇著名散文,这篇散文说的是窗子,但是其用意绝不仅仅是说说窗子而已,而是以窗子来比喻生活、比喻人生。从语言上看,《窗》延续了钱派的一贯手法,用词平实、普通,没有长句,没有什么复杂结构,非常从容地叙述、说理,却又紧紧地扣住了主题。这样的特点对翻译构成的难度不言而喻,翻译中应当时时充分考虑上述特点,尽量在译文中体现出来。

难点解析

1. “窗子许里面人看出去 ,同时也许外面人看进来,所以在热闹地方住的人要用窗帘子 ,替他们私生活做个保障。” 此处 , “外面人”可以说outsider ,但是 “里面人” 却不能用insider ,因为这个词是 “内部的人”、  “知情的人”的意思 ,可以采用意译法,译为those who are inside 。draw the curtain :拉上帘子 , “拉开帘子”是open the curtain。全句译为:“A window likewise allows those who are inside to see outside, and also allows outsiders to see inside. That is why those who live in bustling areas need to draw their curtains to protect their privacy.”。

2. “晚上访人 ,只要看窗里有无灯光 ,就约略可以清楚主人在不在家 ,不必打开了门再问……” ,此处应注意英语语序 。先说的是主要的意思there’s no need to wait until the door is opened  (不必打开了门再 问 ),然后才说其他 。

3.  “关窗的作用等于闭眼。” “作用”是说效果 ,不能译成role或 function 。works: “发生作用”。用shutting 这个词是因为后面要用closing ,这样就避免了用词重复。全句译为 : “Shutting a window works in the same way as closing one’s eyes.”。

4. “天地间有许多景象是要闭了眼才看得见的,譬如梦。” 中文说  “天地间有……” , 英文没有必要说between heaven and earth 。只需译成 “there be”结构即可。  “……是要……”是强调的说法 ,所以英文用only with...来加强语气 。全句可译为 : “There are many things that can be seen only with the eyes closed. Dreams, for instance.”。

5. “假使窗外 的人声物态太嘈杂了” : “窗外”不必译成  outside of the window ,因为现在说的全都是窗里窗外的事,outside 的意思不言自明。“人声物态太嘈杂”可以用 noise 和excitement ,这里的excitement 不是  “激动”的意思 ,而是指各种各样让人兴奋或不兴奋的活动 ,人们吵吵嚷嚷做的各种事情。“物态”则是指窗外的各种景致、事物,原文的“人”和  “物”由noise 和 excitement 代表或隐含了,而英文中noise 一词本来也有形容颜色过艳 的用法 。

6. “关 了窗好让灵魂自由地去探胜 ,安静地默想 。”  “探胜”和  “默想”这两个动词在英文里都转换成 了名词exploration 和contemplation ,这样处理的理 由之一是按照英文的特点 ,不需用那么多的动词 ;如果用 了动词explore 和contemplate ,那么这两个词后面都需要加上宾语 ,加宾语一来颇费思量 ,不知道该加什么宾语好 ,二来原文没有宾语就等于没有限制 ,任何事物都可以包含在这个范围里 ,加上宾语就缩小了原文意思上所包含的范围,从翻译上讲就不等值了。全句译为 : “If outside there is too much noise and excitement, closing the window will make it easier for the soul to engage in free exploration and quiet contemplation.”。

7. “因为只是春天 ,还留着残冷 ,窗子也不能整天整夜不关的。” 翻译这句时需要把语序颠倒一下,先说结果,后说原因。原文说 “整天整夜”是为了强调 “不关”的连续性 ,所以译文为all day and all night  long ,不轻描淡写地仅仅用day and night ,尽量做到语义上的对等。中文说 “不关 ” ,但英文不能用not closed表示 ,所以译成left open 。 “残冷”可以理解为“仍然寒冷”,译为still cold 。全句译为:“But the windows still cannot be left open all day and all night long, since it is still spring, and still cold.”。

参考译文

A window likewise allows those who are inside to see outside, and also allows outsiders to see inside. That is why those who live in bustling areas need to draw their curtains to protect their privacy. When visiting friends at night, there’s no need to wait until the door is opened to ask if they ’re at home. You only have to look at the windows to work out if they are there. Similarly, you don ’t need to wait for a man to open his mouth to work out what ’s on his mind—you can see that from his eyes. Shutting a window works in the same way as closing one’s eyes. There are many things that can be seen only with the eyes closed. Dreams, for instance.

If outside there is too much noise and excitement, closing the window will make it easier for the soul to engage in free exploration and quiet contemplation. Sometimes closing the eyes is connected to shutting the windows: when you feel that the world outside is so commonplace and unrewarding that you want to go back to your hometown  and see relatives and friends from whom you have been long parted, all you have to do is shut the windows before you go to sleep, and close your eyes before you dream. But the windows still cannot be left open all day and all night long, since it is still spring, and still cold.

新浪网北京外国语大学申雨平教授译