看老外改过的托福作文Compareandcontrasttheadvantagesof

When we see the other side of the coin,this invention has had a disastrous effect on the health of not only human beings but other animals and plants as well. EVERY DAY everyday hundreds of new vehicles throng the already overbusy roads. Most of the people due to lack of time and negligence don't even get their vehicles serviced in due time,resulting in enormous pollution. Air pollution as well as noise pollution are on a constant rise these days.in an environment full of smoke and dust where even plants can't survive humans are bound to suffer from various ailments such as allergy, partial deafness, asthma and other lung diseases.During fall, when this smoke combines with fog it gives rise to smog which is the major culprit for the tremendous increase in lung diseases in that season.The gases released as a result of fuel combustion get mixed with vapour in atmosphere and may lead to "acid rain"the major constituent being sulfuric acid .When in contact ,it can even burn the skin and cause several types of allergies.

We say"health is weath" ,but of what use would be all this advancement and fast pace if it has such delEtErious effect on our survival?To conclude i/I would like to suggest that we all could make earth a better planet for our own existence by observing certain rules such as keeping the minimum number of vehicles,getting them serviced and checked/CHECKING for pollution.Underage and untrained people should be barred from driving.Without the use of this commodity no doubt our world would come to a stand still but at the same time a judicious use of it would definitely go a long way in letting us have a joyous ride.
REMEMBER TO START EACH NEW SENTENCE WITH A CAPITAL LETTER

Leaving your native land and migrating to another country ,for sure. confronts people with altogether a different cultural and social atmosphere.While some of the people prefer to follow their own traditions ,most of the migrants gradually imbibe the new environment and culture as best suited to their lifestyles.In my opinion there is no harm in following one's/YOUR own cultural heritage as long as it does not interfere with one's /YOUR growth in the new habitat and also the individual should not be unduly stressed while practicing his/THEIR customs.It would be best to adapt to the new society and its norms keeping part of one's /YOUR own culture alive with least amount of resistance possible.

In a place such as Canada where we see a part of country inhabited majorly/MAINLY by sikhs. It has almost become a mini punjab.in such a place there is no problem for a sikh immigrant to preserve his cultural roots in the earnest/REAL sense .In fact Canada has many religious places called the gurdwaras specially built for that cult of the society.Wow they even have special marriage halls built according to their own customs.in such an environment a person can easily persist with his cultural roots.

Whereas in a place like the United Kingdom if a hindu wishes to practice his customs purely ,it would not be practically possible.(NOT TRUE!)he may not find a temple in the vicinity of his residence where he could pay regular visits.There may not be enough people of his sect to celebrate their mutual festivals.Also if he keeps/REMAINS adamant on not getting mixed up in the new found environment and followS his customs sternly he might at a point start feeling aloof from society .This would defy the basic essence of a man's existence i.e.,"man is a social animal."

To conclude, when moving to another country a person must adapt to the present circumstances. Being rigid in his customs and religion will only add to his stress.rA PERSON MUST RATHER/ather a person must be willing to welcome the new found culture with open arms as all countries,I believe, have rich cultural heritage and customs, while keeping his own traditions alive in his heart and practice them as and when possible.

Most of what you write is good but do remember after a full stop, start the new sentence with a capital letter. Remember also that names of countries have capital letters - Canada/United Kingdom. When you use a possessive, you must use an apostrophe as in one's although it is better to say your.