Time for a Change

As 2005 approaches, many of us are thinking about change. Many of us are setting goals, and making promises to ourselves and to those we love. We may vow to do everything different-better-next year. We set lofty expectations to lose weight, learn a 2nd or 3rd language, never yell at our kids again, or give up our vices completely. And as the calendar closes out one year in favor of another, the timing seems just perfect to make those changes. But are we really, really ready? Attempting to change before we have made a fully educated CHOICE to commit to the process may be our first (and biggest) New Year's mistake.

Psychologists Prochaska, Norcross, and DiClemente, among others, have developed a theory about the process of change, and the process by which we can be effective at implementing long term change in our lives. This Transtheoretical Model involves a number of steps by which people have been professionally and successfully treated and taught to manage their problem behaviors through behavior modification. As you read, ask yourself where you are in the process of change, and what obstacles are standing in your way from reaching the next level, and ultimately success. The example I use is to illustrate is one of weight loss; however, virtually any goal you may have to improve your relationships, time management or organizational skills, or any other aspect, fits the model.

1. PRECONTEMPLATION. In this stage, a person is unaware or under-aware that he or she has a problem. There is no expressed desire to make any changes, and no real concern or immediacy for anything to be different. If asked, we might say that things are fine, and that if nothing is different a year from now, it would be okay. Others around us may think we have a problem, or may be concerned about us, but we don't see their need for concern, or simply don't care. We may be in a state commonly referred to as "denial" or may just be resigned to being this way forever.

2. CONTEMPLATION. In this stage, an individual has become aware that there may be a problem, and has begun considering doing something about it. An overweight person may notice that he or she is out of breath when walking a short flight of stairs, or notices that his or her clothes don't fit the way they used to. A smoker realizes that his or her health may be in jeopardy, and is beginning to "wish" that things could be different. When in this stage we often talk about how we really should x, y or z. We should go to the gym. We should say no to chocolate super fudge brownies. We should eat more fruits and veggies. We should...we should?.we should...but we don't.

3. COMMITMENT. In this stage, we have actually accepted that we have a problem and ARE going to do something about it. We are motivated to change. It is no longer acceptable to stay the same. The thought of NOT changing is unbearable. We can't stand being out of shape any more. We are sick of the way we feel about ourselves. We are sick of watching life instead of participating in it. We go beyond saying "I should" and begin saying "I will." We often enter this stage and commit to change only when the alternative is no longer tolerable. We've become sick and tired of being sick and tired. It is in this stage that change-and progress-are born.

4. PREPARATION. So we've decided to change. Perhaps we've decided to lose weight, or be more active, or change our eating habits, or stop telling ourselves negative thoughts. So how do we go about doing that? We need a plan. We brainstorm. This is our "could" stage. We think of every possible alternative and resource. We could join a gym. We could hire a personal trainer. We could eat nothing but lean cuisines. We could go on a grapefruit diet. We could exercise an hour every day. They may be realistic, or downright crazy, but we're brainstorming. We look at our options, and we choose the ones that will work for us. We prepare for battle. We buy the workout outfits with the matching headbands. We invest in expensive home gym equipment. We buy uNPRoven supplements from professional looking models on TV. We rid our Homes of dangerous temptations. We devise a plan, and are intent on following it through. We are ready.

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