和谐英语

翻译漫谈(九)25点体会

2008-03-15来源:
   
  14.英语的书面语差不多每个句子都要有主语,汉语的主语则不那么重要,如果前面已把主语说清楚,后面的句子不一定用主语。甚至在一个句子里应该出现另外一个主语的时候,这个主语仍然可以省略。  
  They used this kind of scare tactic when I was growing up. I wonder what they use today. 
  我小的时候,他们用过这种吓唬人的办法。现在用什么办法,就不得而知了。(译文第二句,两个主语“他们”和“我”都没有出现。) 

  15.英语有who, which等词,可以引出定语从句,汉语多用并列分句,或单成一句,有时可把定语从句先处理。          
  Richardson, who served as both Secretary of Defense and Secretary of Health, Education and Welfare during the Nixon Administration, was talking about the negotiations for a Law of the Sea treaty, which came to a virtual conclusion last week after six years of deliberations. 
  理查森曾在尼克松政府中担任国防部长和卫生、教育和福利部长,他是在谈到关于海洋法条约的谈判时说这番话的。(译文用了并列分句) 
  I have never had much patience with the writers who claim from the reader an effort to understand their meaning. 
  有些作家,读者要费力气才能看懂他们的意思,我对这样的作家一向是没有多少耐心的。(原文中的定语从句在译文中提前处理。) 

  16.英语的主语部分可以很长,其中包括几个介词引导的短语作定语,汉语往往用分句来表达,或者独立成句。 
  The 180-page document, with more than 300 articles and eight annexes, definitively covers every conceivable issue dealing with the seas, from the definition of what constitutes an island to the jurisdiction over fish that live in fresh water but spawn in the ocean. 
  这份长达一百八十页的文件,有三百余条,并有八个附件。它涉及能够想到的每一个与海洋有关的问题,从岛屿的定义,到对在淡水生长而在海洋产卵的鱼类的管辖权,都做了明确的规定。(原文中的主语部分独立成句。) 

  17.英语除了有who, which等词外,还有动词的-ing形式,因此句子可以很长,但组织得很严密。汉语叙事,则多用并列结构,一层一层地把事情说清楚。有时可以把较长地句子译成几个短句。 
  In the winter of 1879, James Lecky, exchequer clerk from Ireland, and privately interested in phonetics, keyboard temperament, and Gaelic, all of which subjects he imposed on me, dragged me to a meeting of a debating society called The Zetetical: a junior copy of the once well known Dialectical Society founded to discuss John Stuart Mill’s Essay on Liberty when that was new.  
  1879年冬天,詹姆斯·莱基拉我去参加一次辩论会。莱基是爱尔兰人,在财政部门当职员,有空喜欢研究语音,练习弹琴,学习盖尔语,他还硬让我也学这些东西。这次他带我去参加的辩论会是一个名叫“探索学会”的团体举办的。当年约翰·斯图尔特·米尔的文章《论自由》刚刚发表时候,成立过一个“辩证学会”来讨论这篇文章,这个学会曾名噪一时。探索学会就是仿照这个学会建立起来的,只是没有它那么有名罢了。(原文虽然较长,但并不很复杂。主语部分有一个同位语和一个定语从句,谓语部分有一个同位语和一个状语从句。译文则分成了五个句子。) 

  18.汉语一般不用一连串的定语,一连串的“的字。适当地在“的”字前增加动词,就显得有些变化,不那么单调。 
  The resounding success of the Curacao experiment whetted the appetites of Florida livestock raisers for a similar feat that would relieve them of the scourge of screw-worms. 
  库拉索岛上的实验取得巨大的成功.引起了佛罗里达州牲畜饲养者的兴趣.他们也想以同样的办法消除螺旋锥蝇这一祸害.(原文主语部分是一名词定语,若译作“库拉索岛上的实验的巨大成功”,就连用了两个“的”字.如在第二个“的”字前面加上“取得”二字,就好一点。现在把这一部分译成一个分句就更好了。) 


  19.英语在一个句子里往往先说个人的感受,再说与感受有关的动作,最后才说最初发生的事情。汉语则相反,往往按照事情发生的顺序来叙述,最后才说个人的感受。 
  The most important day I remember in all my life is the one on which my teacher,Anne Mansfield Sullivan, came to me. I am filled with wonder when I consider the immeasurable contrast between the two lives which it connects.  
  在我的记忆里,安妮·曼斯菲尔德·沙利文老师来的那一天,是我一生中最重要的日子。从这一天开始,我的生活和以前迥然不同,一想到这一点,我就感到非常兴奋。 


  20.表达同样的意思,英语的结构比较紧,汉语的结构比较松。 
  A gang of men, under the direction of their energetic and likeable foreman, 25-year-old Phineas P. Gage, was working on a new line of the Rutland and Burlington railroad.  
  一伙工人正跟着他们的领班在拉特兰-伯灵顿铁路的新线路上干活。这位领班名叫菲尼斯·P·盖奇,二十五岁,他精力充沛,待人和气。(原文是一简单句,有一个主语,一个谓语动词,却包含了这么多内容,结构显得比较紧。译文分为两句,第二句还包含两个并列分句,结构显得比较松。) 

  21.拆句的情况多,合句的情况少。 
 Poets as we know have always a made great use of alliteration. They are persuaded that the repetition of a sound gives an effect of beauty. 
  我们知道,诗人一般总喜欢押头韵,觉得重复一个声音会产生美的效果。(原文两句都比较短,译文合成一句,语气较顺。) 

  22.注意文体,应该用口语的地方,选用适合口语的词句。 
  “I remember thinking, ‘No. No. It’s not Jackson, it’s not my husband, it’s not my Jackson,’” she said. “But it was. He was lying in the street, right across from our house. The police said a man shot him over a parking space.” 
  “记得我当时就想:‘不,不。不是杰克逊,不是我丈夫,不是我的杰克逊’”她说。“可是,那不是别人,正是他。他躺在大街上,就在我们的房子对面。警察说,为了争一块停车的地方,人家把他打死了。” 

  23.一段文章的最后一句,特别是全文最后一段的最后一句,要比较有力,否则文章煞不住。中英文都是这样。翻译时就要把这最后一句的分量表达出来,给人以深刻的印象。 
  Words have weight, sound and appearance; it is only by considering these that you can write a sentence that is good to look at and good to listen to. 
  词具有一定的分量、声音和形状,只有考虑到这些因素,写出来的句子才能既好听,又好看。(若把“好听”放在最后,就压不住了。) 

  24.题目可以照原文译,也可以根据文章的内容拟定。 
  A Valentine to One Who Cared Too Much. 
  衷肠曲(这个题目是参照文章的内容拟定的。原题的意思是:在情人节写给一个人的信,这个人关心的事情太多了。) 

  25.遇到中国读者可能不熟悉的典故、人名、地名等,除了加注以外,还可以在译文中加几个字,略加说明。 
  I learned a great many new words that day. I do not remember what they all were; but I do know that mother, father,sister, teacher were among them — words that were to make the world blossom for me, “like Aaron’s rod, with flowers.”