令人头痛的圣诞节

人们期望着，寒假里的那些派对和礼物能够为生活增添欢乐。但随着圣诞及新年的临近，一些学生正意识到，这些节假日只会给自己带来难题。不论你相信与否，那些繁忙的日程表，应邀出席派对清单以及一堆急需购买的礼物，所有的这些使得这个节日假期乐趣全无。并且，有些人反映，节日里他们与朋友间的友谊也如履薄冰。

All those parties and gifts that come with the holiday season are supposed to fill our lives with joy. But as the Christmas and New Year's season grows near, some students are thinking that the holidays will only bring problems. Believe it or not, those busy schedules, a list of parties to attend, and gifts to buy are taking all the fun out of the season – and, according to some, putting friendships at risk.

华中师范大学二年级学生，18岁的杜敬琳就正为买送礼物而发愁。

Du Jinglin, an 18-year-old sophomore at Central China Normal University, is bothered by all the gifts she has to buy and distribute.

“在节日期间，一个不落地派送朋友礼物，这真的是一个负担，”杜敬琳说。“在此期间，更多人倾向于展示社交能力的舞台，而不再是分享真情。”

"It's such a burden to cover all of my friends during the holiday season," said Du. "[This period] has become more about showcasing one's social skills than about sharing love."

杜敬琳表示，去年他忘了送一位室友礼物。此后，她们间就有着说不出的尴尬。

Last year, Du says she forgot to buy a gift for one of her roommates and ever since there has been an unspoken awkwardness between them.

深圳某咨询中心的心理专家齐峥表示，像杜敬琳这样的经历显示出年轻人已经误解了赠送礼物的初衷。

Qi Zheng, a psychologist at a Shenzhen-based consulting center, says stories like Du's show that young people have come to misunderstand the purpose of gift-giving.

“节日里的一件礼物或者某些特殊时刻收发的一条短信，这些都不能够维持一段友谊，”齐峥说。“友情需要长期地奉献出自己的情感与时间。”

"Friendships cannot be sustained by a single gift on a holiday, or by a text message on some special occasions," said Qi. "[Friendships] require long-term devotion of both emotion and time."

派对也是同样的道理：每年一两次的朋友聚会不能确保密友们不会彼此疏远。19岁的人大学生陈银泽已婉拒了两个来自同学的派对邀请，其中的一个是通宵K歌派对。在他眼中，聚会只会提醒他一个事实，那就是他与一些朋友开始有了距离，变得生疏起来。

The same goes for parties: Gathering with friends once or twice a year can't ensure that close friends don't drift apart. Chen Yinze, a 19-year-old at Renmin University, has turned down two party invitations from his classmates, one being an overnight karaoke bash. In his eyes, the party would have only reminded him of how far he has drifted from some of his friends.

“每次我和同学一起参加聚会或活动，我都感到没什么好说的，而且我永远都是那个不合群的人，”陈银泽说。

"Every time I go to a party or an event with classmates, I feel like I have nothing to say and am always the one being left out," said Chen.

他坚称自己并不内向自闭，也绝非目中无人。他将这种距离感归咎于同学之间缺乏接触及共同爱好。“老实说，在我们班，有些人我很久都没和他们说过话。”

He insists he's not introverted or arrogant, and attributes this distance to limited contact with classmates and a lack of shared interests. "To be honest, there're some [people] in my class I haven't talked with for a really long time."

寻找真情

Where's the love?

在节日期间，情侣们也发现彼此的关系步履维艰。

Even couples, it seems, can find themselves on rocky ground during the holiday season.

在过去两年中，来自华东科技大学经济学专业，20岁的梁宇就常常在圣诞前夕同女友大动干戈。

For the last two years, Liang Yu, a 20-year-old economics major at East China University of Science and Technology, has had big fights with his girlfriend on Christmas Eve.

“买称心的礼物，说对心的话，甚至要点合胃口的菜——这些任务令我难以招架，”梁宇说。“最糟糕的是不可能将所有事情都做得恰到好处，以满足我女朋友对一个完美、浪漫圣诞的期许。”

"Buying the right gift, saying the right words, even ordering the right dishes – these responsibilities can exhaust me," said Liang. "The worst thing is that it's impossible to do everything right and meet my girlfriend's expectations for a perfect, romantic Christmas."

然而，许多妙龄女士会辩解说，从某种程度上看，追求别致假日这个“无理要求”也表明对方是否真的在乎自己。

Many young ladies, however, would argue that their "unreasonable requirements" for a fancy holiday to some extent reflect the quality of their relationship.

四川大学大一新生，18岁的左淑仪称这些节日是“男孩们含蓄示爱的最好时机”。

Zuo Shuyi, an 18-year-old freshman at Sichuan University, calls the holiday season "the right time for boys to show their love in a more symbolic way".

同时，齐峥也建议情侣们努力加深相互间的了解。

Qi, meanwhile, suggests that couples try to be more understanding of each other.

“情侣们不要刻意追求电视剧或电影中出现的完美场景，”齐峥说。“如果两个人平时就能够细心经营彼此的感情，那么每天都将是圣诞节或情人节。”

"Couples should not push too hard for the idealistic scenes often shown in TV shows and movies," said Qi. "If the two shepherd the relationship well on a daily basis, every day will be like Christmas and Valentine's Day."