正文
求振作?自助者天助也
福克斯博士说,“最达观的人能够体验到各类情绪,有乐观的,也有悲观的。”她表示,要享受生活、保持良好感觉,一个人大约需要动用四种正面情绪来抵抗一种负面情绪的影响。她发现,觉得生活悲苦的人往往只有一到两种正面情绪来对抗某种负面情绪。
It's possible to change your cognitive bias by training the brain to focus more on the positive than on the negative. In the lab, Dr. Fox showed subjects pairs of images, one negative (the aftermath of a bomb blast, say) and one either positive (a cute child) or neutral (an office). Participants were asked to point out, as quickly as possible, a small target that appeared immediately after each positive or neutral image - subliminally requiring them to pay less attention to the negative images, which had no target.
实验表明,我们是有可能通过训练大脑多关注正面信息、少关注负面信息,最终改变自己的认知倾向的。福克斯博士在实验中向参与对象每次展示两幅图像,一幅是负面的(例如某个爆炸案现场的图片),一幅则是正面的(例如一个可爱的孩子)或者中性的(例如一间办公室)。研究人员在每次展示完正面或中性的图片后都会要求参与对象尽快说出头脑中闪现了什么,而在展示完负面图片后则没有这个要求,以此潜移默化地降低实验对象对负面信息的关注度。
Want to try this at home? Write down, in a journal, the positive and negative things that happen to you each day, whether running into an old friend or missing your bus. Try for four positives for each negative. You'll be training your brain to look for the good even as you acknowledge the bad, Dr. Fox says.
福克斯博士表示,如果读者想在家里尝试这个训练,可以在日记本中写下每天遇到的开心和不开心的事情,例如意外遇到一位老友,或者没能赶上一班公交车。但要注意每写下一件不开心的事情,要尽量同时写下四件开心的事情。如此这般,大脑逐渐就会习惯去寻找积极向上的东西,即便我们依然会面对或发现一些负面的东西。
When I asked, I was pleasantly surprised by the number and variety of ways people said they treat themselves with compassion, care and kindness. Anittah Patrick, a 35-year-old online marketing consultant in Philadelphia, celebrated her emergence from a long depression by making herself a valentine. She covered an old picture frame with lace and corks from special bottles of wine, and drew a big heart inside. Using old computer keys, she spelled out the message 'Welc*me Back.' Then she put it on her dressing table, where she sees it every morning. 'It's a nice reminder that I'll get through whatever challenge I'm facing,' she says.
当我向人们询问时,惊喜地发现大家自我同情、自我关心和自我爱护的方式方法多种多样、不胜枚举。费城35岁的网络营销顾问安妮塔•帕特里克(Anittah Patrick)以给自己过一个情人节的方式,庆祝自己从长期的抑郁症中走出来。她用蕾丝包住一个老相框,用特殊葡萄酒瓶的软木塞在里面拼出一个大大的心形图案,还用旧的电脑键盘上的按键,拼出“Welc*me Back”字样,然后把它摆放在梳妆台上,让自己每天早上都能看到。她说,“这能够很好地提醒我自己,我能够面对任何困难的挑战。”
If Kris Wittenberg, a 45-year-old entrepreneur from Vail, Colo., starts to feel bad, she tells herself 'Stop,' and jots down something she is grateful for. She writes down at least five things at the end of each day. 'You start to see how many negative thoughts you have,' she says.
来自科罗拉多州韦尔市(Vail)、现年45岁的企业主克里斯•维滕贝格(Kris Wittenberg)在感觉不好时,会对自己“喊停”,然后记下一些让她感激的事情。每天终了,她至少能记下五件这样的事情。她说,“这时候你就会开始意识到自己之前的想法有多悲观。”
Kevin Kilpatrick, 55, a college professor and children's author in San Diego, talks to himself - silently, unless he is in the car - going over everything positive he has accomplished recently. 'It helps me to hear it out loud, especially from the voice that's usually screaming at me to do better, work harder and whatever else it wants to berate me about,' he says.
圣迭戈市(San Diego)55岁的大学教授、童书作家凯文•基尔帕特里克(Kevin Kilpatrick)会在心里默默过一遍最近完成的每一件开心的事情,如果当时是坐在自己车里他就会大声说出来。他说,“这么做能够让我自己清楚地听到开心的事情,特别是在心中还有个声音嘶吼着要求自己做得更好、工作更努力些等等让我忍不住自责的情况下。”
Adam Urbanski, 42, who owns a marketing firm and lives in Irvine, Calif., keeps a binder labeled 'My Raving Fans' in his office. Filling it are more than 100 cards and letters from clients and business contacts thanking him for his help. 'All it takes is reading a couple of them to realize that I do make a difference,' Mr. Urbanski says.
加州欧文市(Irvine)42岁的亚当•乌尔班斯基(Adam Urbanski)经营着一家市场营销公司,他在办公室里放了一本标记为“我的铁杆粉丝”(My Raving Fans)的活页夹,里面有100多张名片,还有客户和生意上的联络人寄来的感谢信。他说,“只要从里面拿几封感谢信出来读一读,就会让我觉得自己还是有作为的。”
He has something he calls his '1-800-DE-FUNK line.' It's not a real number, but a strategy he uses when he is upset. He calls a friend, vents for 60 seconds, then asks her about her problems. 'It's amazing how five minutes of working on someone else's problems makes my own disappear,' he says. Sometimes, as a reality check, he asks himself, 'What Would John Nash Think?' in honor of the mathematician, Nobel laureate and subject of the film 'A Beautiful Mind,' who suffered from paranoid schizophrenia.
乌尔班斯基还有一个他自己称之为“1-800-DE-FUNK”热线的秘密武器,这当然不是一个真的电话号码,而是他在自己情绪不佳时的一种应对策略。他会给一个朋友打电话,自己发泄一分钟左右,然后听朋友讲述她所遇到的问题。他说,“花个五分钟时间讨论别人遇到的问题,自己的问题反而好像消失了,这真的很神奇。”有时候,为了让自己清醒一些,他会问自己,“如果是约翰•纳什(John Nash)会怎么想呢?”这也是出于对这位数学家、诺贝尔经济学奖得主的一种敬重。约翰•纳什患有偏执型精神分裂症,是电影《美丽心灵》(A Beautiful Mind)主人翁的原型。
Are things really as dire as he thinks? Is he overreacting? 'It always turns out that whatever keeps me down isn't really as bad as I thought,' Mr. Urbanski says.
乌尔班斯基表示,设想了约翰•纳什的偏执想法后,自己会忖度,“事情真有他想的那么恐怖吗?他是不是反应过度了?思量到最后,我总是会意识到,其实情况不像我原来想象的那么糟糕。”
- 上一篇
- 下一篇