正文
朋友一生一起走:五种方式这样经营友情
Friends in your life are like pillars on your porch. Sometimes they hold you up and sometimes they lean on you. Sometimes it's just enough to know they're standing by. Friendship doubles your joy and divides your grief, and that the most beautiful discovery that true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.
在你的一生中,朋友就如支撑门廊的柱子,有时他们支持着你,有时也依赖着你。只要你知道他们一直在你身边就已足够。友情会使你的快乐翻倍,让你的痛苦减半。而最重要的发现是真正的朋友不会因为分隔两地而产生隔阂。
Easily the most important place to have a friend is in marriage. For that reason, marriage counselors continually advise husbands and wives to be friends, pointing out that you may divorce your spouse, but you don't divorce your friend.
我们很容易想到,最喜欢朋友角色的地方就是婚姻。因此,许多婚姻顾问都建议丈夫和妻子成为彼此的朋友,因为你可以离开你的伴侣,但你绝对不会离开你的朋友。
Friendship stabilizes relationships in the business and social worlds as well. A friendship is priceless and should be cherished, cultivated, and nurtured.
友情同样在职场和社交生活中起稳固作用。友情无价,它需要被珍惜,培养和经营。
1. Remembering the golden rule
牢记黄金准则
Without a doubt, the greatest human relations principle is to treat other people like you want to be treated. Friendship requires many qualities — unselfishness, genuine care for the other person, and the ability to listen when the other person needs to talk, to name a few. When you show respect for your friends and gratitude for their friendship, you'll be blessed in untold ways.
毋庸置疑,最坚不可摧的待人原则就是待人如己。友情需要许多品质:对他人无私,真诚的关怀,当他人需要时倾听对方的心声。当你表达对朋友的尊重和对这份友谊的感恩之情时,对你的庇佑和祝福也会通过各种方式来到你身边。
You can't know what has gone on in the rude person's life that day, but you can assume that his or her day hasn't gone well. Maybe a loved one lost his job, her boss reprimanded her unjustly, he's coming down with the flu, or she just found out that her teenager is doing drugs.
也许你的朋友那天表现得非常粗鲁无礼,你也许不知道在他身上到底发生了什么,但你可以假设他/她过得并不开心。也许是爱人失业了,也许是她的老板训斥她办事不公,可能是他染了流感,抑或是她刚发现自己的孩子在吸毒。
Whatever the cause of the rudeness, you don't have to accentuate the problem. A kind word or a gentle, understanding smile may help the person more than returned rudeness would.
无论是什么理由让他/她如此野蛮无礼,你也不需要去强调人家的错误。比起同样粗鲁的行为,用一句友好的问候、一个善解人意的笑容作为回应,更能帮助他们。
2. Considering foes as friends
视敌为友
A friend looks after your own good, is attached to you by affection, and entertains other sentiments of esteem. On the other hand, a foe is someone who isn't interested in your well-being.
朋友会照顾你的利益,因为彼此的情感而重视支持你,认真对待你的情绪。相反,敌人不会在意你的幸福。
Yet some students view their teachers as enemies. However, a student's success in school partly depends on the teacher's effectiveness in the classroom. Instead of being an enemy, a teacher who corrects you and helps you to achieve can be the best friend you ever had.
有些学生把他们的老师视为敌人。但是一个学生在学校里的成功部分是取决于老师在课堂上的成效。不要把他们当敌人,帮助你纠正错误取得成功的老师应该是你拥有的最好的朋友!
This kind of thinking, along with a little attitude adjustment, helps you to convert foes to friends, and both of you are better off.
这种思维方式伴随你态度上的转变,会帮助你将敌化友,而你们双方也会感觉舒服很多。