爱情课堂：伤感情的十大习惯

Could you be harming your relationship without realising it? Here are ten habits that could lead to a break-up lest you keep them in check.
有没有可能在你没有意识到的情况下，你已经在伤害你们的感情？下面是可能导致分手的10大习惯，来看看你有么：

1. Giving him the silent treatment
沉默以对

While it might feel good to freeze him out and let him stew, not speaking to him will only have a detrimental effect on your relationship in the long run. He’ll get frustrated by your lack of communication and you’ll never get your point across if you’re not actually speaking to him. Successful relationships are based good communication, so instead of sulking and giving him the cold shoulder, try talking through your problems and finding the solution together.
冷落他，让他好好反省反省，这样做或许能解你心头之恨，但从长远看，这种做法只会使关系陷入僵局。你的缄默的确挫伤他的锐气，但如果你不说出来，他怎么会知道你在想什么。成功的感情以良好的沟通为基础，所以不要把事情闷在心里、冷眼相向，把问题摆出来，共同解决。

2. Nag, nag nagging
唠叨，各种唠叨

Yes, he always forgets to take the rubbish and it really gets your goat, but nagging him isn’t going to make things any better. Men tune out the sound of women’s voices when they start to irritate them so it becomes a vicious cycle – you ask him to do something, he zones out, you get frustrated and ask him again and again and infinitum causing a build up of resentment and anger on both sides.
他总是忘记带走垃圾，这的确很烦人，但是唠叨不是上策。男人被激怒的时候，会对女人的婆婆妈妈置若罔闻，这样，恶性循环就开始了——你要求他做什么，他不听，你生气并反复说，结果呢，双方都满腹怨气，甚至开始仇视对方。

Instead of demanding he do things in a nagging tone, try a more positive approach. Give him a cuddle, smile, look him in the eye and ask if he’d mind taking the rubbish out later. You’re much more likely to get what you want with a warm approach and he won’t resent you for asking.
用聪明的办法代替烦人的唠叨。开口前拥抱一下、给个笑脸或用期待地眼光注视他，然后再问他是否可以顺便把垃圾带走。这种以柔克刚的方法更有利于你达到目的，而他也会乐意效劳。

3. Avoiding conflict
回避冲突

Never fighting or failing to bring up issues that are bothering you is a relationship time bomb. When you’re concerned about something it won’t just go away if you ignore it – just like a bump in the carpet it will pop up somewhere else. Remember, it’s normal and healthy for couples to disagree from time to time. As long as you argue constructively and are able to compromise and move ahead, it’s actually good for your relationship.
回避令你闹心的问题，就等于埋下了一枚定时炸弹。当你为某事忧虑时，不去想它不等于它不存在——就像地毯下的硬物，不是在这儿鼓出来，就是在那儿鼓出来。记住，两人之间偶尔意见不合很正常，而且在某种程度上还有益关系和睦。只要你持积极态度去讨论问题，并能得饶人处且饶人，实际上，分歧促进了关系和谐。

4. Playing the drama queen
小题大做

Losing your temper, crying or storming out every time something doesn’t go your way will soon wear thin with your man. Instead of throwing a strop and flouncing out, sit down and talk through your problems. It takes far less energy than slamming doors and throwing tantrums.
一不顺心就火冒三丈、大呼小叫、要么夺门而出，他不会忍你太久。坐下来谈谈，看看问题的症结在哪里，不要动不动就龙颜大怒。摔门、发脾气是体力活儿，还是说话来得轻松。

5. Being possessive and clingy
占有欲强，太黏人

During the honeymoon period it’s nice to do everything together, but insisting he spends every waking hour with you and you alone is never a good idea. He’ll start to feel smothered. Everyone – even married couples need some time alone and socializing with friends who aren’t you is also important. Encourage him to go out with his friends or stay home and watch the game solo from time to time. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
蜜月期的两个人同出同入人人羡慕，但是如果要求他时时刻刻与你形影不离那就不好了。这样会让他产生窒息感。每个人都需要时间独处（已婚夫妻更是如此），而且需要与外面的朋友交往。适时地鼓励他出去找找朋友，或者把他单独留在家看节目。别忘了，距离产生美。