七条秘籍提升你的说服力

Really persuasive people understand that there is no sense wasting time arguing facts. Most of the world does not function in black and white. They value strong opinions and will make sure that you are entitled to yours. In fact, they will make sure they give you full credit for every argument of yours that has some validity. This makes it harder for you to fully dismiss their point of view. When you are persuading people, reinforce their credibility on facts and opinions rather than dismissing them outright. Then they'll be more likely to pay you equal respect in the exchange and be more open to the merits of your opposing view.
劝说专家明白浪费时间争论事实没有意义，这世界上很少有非黑即白的。他们喜欢强烈的观点，会确保你能表达你的观点。事实上，只要你说的有点道理他们就会愿意相信你，这样你就很难完全驳回他的观点。你在说服别人的时候可以在别人说事实和观点的时候表示信任，而不是一味地反驳，这样他们就可能回与你同样的尊重，更愿意接受你相反的意见里正确的地方。

5. They Offer Satisfaction
他们会让对方满意

Smart persuaders know that they don't have to win every little battle to win the war. They are more than willing to sacrifice when it helps the overall cause. They are ready to find the easiest path to yes. Often that is simply to give you what you want whenever possible. In my old lending days, we would often deal with busy underwriters who asked for items we knew they already had. Instead of arguing the point, we would just resend the documents and save our energy for issues that were not so easily resolved. Give ground where you can and hold your ground only where it matters. Choose being successful over being right.
聪明的劝说者知道要赢得全局不必锱铢必较。他们愿意非常为了整体的进程做出一些牺牲。他们总是知道怎么样能够最简单地达成目的。通常只要抓住机会就给你你想要的。我过去放贷款的时候我们经常碰到承销商问我们要一些文件，我们知道他们已经有了，可是我们不跟他们争论这一点，我们只是重新给他们发一遍文件，省点力气做难办的事。只要不触及底线，能让步就让步吧，成功比正确更重要。

6. They Know When to Shut Up
他们知道什么时候该闭嘴

Successful persuaders get that you don't win the battle by constantly berating people with an unending verbal barrage. Wearing people down is not an effective strategy. They carefully support their arguments and check in with questions that will help to close the conversation. Then they step back. The great sales trainer Tom Hopkins still today teaches these decades-old techniques of his mentor J. Douglas Edwards. His most important lesson is "Whenever you ask a closing question, shut up. The first person who speaks, loses."
成功的劝说者知道要达到目的不能靠无休止的口头攻势来训斥别人，把别人磨烦了可不是有效的策略。他们小心地支撑着自己的观点，想想有什么问题可以让谈话早点结束，然后就不说了。了不起的销售培训师汤姆霍普金斯今天还传授者他的导师道格拉斯埃德沃兹的这些几十年来的老技术。他最重要的一颗就是“问完终结问题就赶紧闭嘴，谁第一个说话就输了。”

7. They Know When to Back Away
他们知道什么时候该收手

Urgency and immediacy are often the enemies of real persuasion. It's possible to close a less significant sale through urgency, but deep ideas require time and thought to take root. Great persuaders bring you along in your own time. And they give you the space and time to carefully consider their position. They know that nothing is more powerful than your persuading yourself on their behalf. That almost never occurs in the presence of the persuader. The next time you want to persuade someone of something truly important, follow the tips above, make your case, and walk away. If they don't come around, you were probably wasting your effort in the first place.
紧迫感往往是说服工作的敌人。用紧迫感来达成一桩小买卖是可行的，但是有深度的想法需要时间和思考才能扎根。厉害的劝说者会让你一直想着他们的建议，会给你时间和空间仔细考虑他们的立场。他们知道没有什么比你代表他们给自己洗脑更有用的了，而这在劝说的当下基本是不会发生的。下次你要跟别人说一件特别重要的事情的话就照我说的做，说完了就走，如果人家不来找你，说明你一开始就在做无用功。