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爱情也有公式可以计算?

2010-02-09来源:和谐英语

中国自古以来就注重婚姻,并对终身大事的投资越来越大。大多数父母认为经济基础是美满婚姻的保证;而年轻恋人间,更多的女孩子敢于选择裸婚,一方面是因为她们经济独立;另一方面是因为她们更看重对方创造财富的能力,而不是他现在拥有的钱财。于是,在婚姻物质化的今天,出现了爱情不等式:价值9元人民币的结婚证书+笔记坚贞的爱情和信任>车+房子+存款+蜜月+……。在爱情的天平中,你更倾向于哪一方呢?

"A naked marriage is just getting married without anything, no ring, no ceremony, no apartment or car, not even a honeymoon or money saved up."

That's the basic idea of a naked marriage. More young people, especially in big cities, accept the idea of getting married without anything but a marriage certificate, which only costs the couple 9 yuan or about 1 dollar. Usually, a wedding ceremony may cost at least several thousand yuan, without calculating in the cost of buying an apartment and a car.

Hu Qin and her fiance went to Beijing last year starting their new careers, and rented an apartment in Beijing. They'll have a naked marriage this year, only having one day off to get the marriage certificate.

"I think the most important thing in getting married is to have the certificate. Personally, I don't like to wear any jewelry. Even if he gives me a diamond ring I'll just put it in a box at home. And speaking of the wedding ceremony, I saw many of my friends were terribly bothered by it and even their parents felt exhausted when preparing the ceremony. Further more, my fiance is from Guizhou and my hometown is in Sichuan, and now we work and live in Beijing, so it's even harder for us to prepare a wedding ceremony. Therefore, we decided to have a simple marriage."

Getting married has always been one of the most important moments in one's life here in China. In the 1970s, people would prepare a bike, a watch and a sewing machine as the "must have" gifts when married. And in the 1980s, things had changed into a refrigerator, a TV set, and a washing machine. Along with the economic development of society, the gifts for marriage become more expensive, like now many people would ask for apartments and cars. Therefore, in such a material society, the group of young people's choice for simple marriages gets people's attention.

Gong Haiyan is the CEO of a popular matchmaking network "Shi Ji Jia Yuan". She is crowned as the best internet matchmaker in China by the online community.

"On our network, men who have a better economic condition and women who are young and pretty will have better results. You can tell from that people now are more materialistic. But as we went through the economic crisis and real estate prices have rocketed, people gradually lowered their prospects down to earth. It's a good phenomenon to see young couples go back to the essence of marriage."

However, many parents don't agree with "naked marriage", especially the girls' parents. Xu Jie has a daughter who is in her twenties. She is strictly against the idea. She says a solid material basis is fundamental for a happy marriage.

"If my daughter will get married, my only requirement for them is that they should have their own place to live. If they don't want a ceremony, then at least they should go out for a trip just to remember the moment. Since that's the only chance in your life. When you get old, if you want to make up for missing your times, it won't come back again. With only the 9-yuan certificate, I don't believe they'll treasure their marriage. Since now the society has changed compared to our time. It has so much material attraction."

Xu says when they were young, all the families were fairly the same, didn't have so many differences. All the couples went through hardships and improved their lives step by step. As a parent, she doesn't want her daughter to suffer a rough time like her.

"On one hand, I think the naked marriage lacks a sense of security. And on the other hand, I think why my daughter should lead a hard life. Although people say ‘they'll have bread', it is only an illusion. Reality is always cruel. But if that is my daughter's choice, I'll try my best to help them to buy an apartment or to pay for their wedding photos and a honeymoon trip."

The concept of "naked marriage" challenges the traditional views on marriage and love. Under the growing living pressures, most men are exhausted by providing the family and the mission is becoming impossible. And women are now independent inside the economy. Therefore, more young girls don't mind having a naked marriage.

Guo Fanni, an office lady is one of them. She embraces the idea and she sees the man's capability to earn money more important than the money he actually has.

"I accept the idea. I actually bought my own apartment rather than ask him to buy one for me. I feel safe and comfortable with that. I'm marrying a man not his money. Although I admit a marriage needs a material basis, I still think the capability to earn money is more important than how much he has to start with. I can't bear a man who has no initiatives."

During the interview, most girls accepted naked marriage as long as they and their would-be husbands love each other. And most of men interviewed would like to try their best to dress up their marriage. Unless they don't have other options, they wouldn't have a naked marriage with their lover. And young people are much more confident in their love lives than their parents.