Can Existential Therapy Give You a Sense of Wellbeing?

My journey to becoming a therapist began with a desire to develop greater significance in my life and improve the quality of my relationships. Having worked as an organisational psychologist for many years, my work increasingly involved coaching senior managers in the art of managing their organisations. These sessions revealed that, contrary to my expectations, the help they required was related to more personal aspects of their livesoutside of work.

Despite considerable coaching experience, I felt that if I were to assist them on this journey into exploring meaning in their lives both inside and outside of work, I would have to develop more specific psychotherapeutic skills. I began my search for my psychotherapeutic Home. Over the next few years, I dabbled in many modalities, including psychodynamic, transpersonal, cognitive behavioural and humanistic. Despite these approaches having much to offer, I felt that their underpinning assumptions didn't fully mirror my own philosophical beliefs about what it is to be human. Then I stumbled upon existential psychotherapy.

Existential psychotherapy is a form of therapy that is grounded more in philosophy than psychology. Existential philosophy offers a radically different perspective on 'who we are as individuals'. It focuses on certain aspects of our existence i.e. choice, freedom, responsibility and anxiety within the limits of our own lives and our lives as human beings. In this way, psychological distress is not seen as pathological but as a normal aspect ofstruggling with our own personal answers to life's challenges. From this perspective, the problems, dilemmas and paradoxes that we face are not unique but shared challenges for us all.

Anyone who has tried to explore these concepts from the philosophical literature will be aware of how complex andinaccessible they can be. On the other hand, these concepts are discussed in more simplistic terms in films, magazine articles and conversations. So how can we explore choice, freedom and responsibility in the context of our own self-development and, more specifically, in therapy?

Personal change and mastery in my own life began with questioning the choices I made and exploring ways in which I could really exercise freedom in my life. It involved developing a very personal relationship with my self and trusting that I was the best judge of what was good for me. It required me to challengeothers' expectations, and appreciate the ways in which I was created and defined by what I did and with whom I interacted. It invited me to clarify what I wanted from my life and identify the unchallenged assumptions under which I operated. It allowed me to evaluate the rightness of my choices rather than using others' criteria of success. This way of being became a journey, not adestination.

Many books have been written on how to bring about change in our lives. Some operate as a self-help checklist where goals and objectives are set to focus the reader on realising their potential. Others offer a way to escape from the rat race and become more independent and autonomous in our work. However, realfreedom to exercise the choices in our lives comes from recognising that we already have complete freedom now to be who we want to be. Slavish adherence to goal-setting and planning can become as much a trap as going along with what isexpected of us by others.

Often major life events initiate change in our lives: the death of a family member, loss of a job, divorce or illness. Sometimes we are suddenly plunged into the depths of despair and fear, becoming paralysed and desperately wanting to maintain the status quo. Alternatively, we may embrace the change and make new choices that alter our lives even further. Why do we so often rely on imposed change to make those choices? How can we harness the energy and power to choose desirable changes as a way of being in the world? If we fail to embrace change, our life will become like the wallpaper in our