在意大利唱单身情歌?

Dear Economist:
亲爱的经济学家，

I'm a 32-year-old American woman; I moved to Italy about five years ago and later applied for a master's programme at an Italian university. Average earnings for my BA in political science are low, so I wasn't missing out on much.
我是一个32岁的美国女人，大约5年前搬到意大利，后来在意大利的一所大学申请攻读硕士。我的政治学学士学位给我带来的平均收入很低，因此我也没损失多少。

My problems are two-fold: first, dating. Italy has the second-oldest population in the world. Seeing a single thirtysomething is like finding a unicorn. Eliminate men who live with their mothers, are chain-smokers, or are shorter than me, and I'm in a convent.
我的问题有两方面：首先是约会。意大利是全球老龄化第二严重的国家。在这里，30多岁的单身男性简直是凤毛麟角。除去与母亲生活在一起的男性，剩下的要么是烟鬼，要么比我矮，我就像生活在修道院里。

Second, my Italian university has decided to reverse its previous decision to accept my American degree. I am being forced to re-earn an Italian BA, which could take a further year.
其次，我的意大利大学决定取消之前的决定，不再接受我的美国学位。我被迫要重修一个意大利的学士学位，这可能又得多花上一年时间。

I'd hate to turn down another degree, but can I handle another year's worth of pasta and enforced singledom?
我不愿拒绝另一个学位，但我还能再忍受一年意大利面食和被迫的单身生活吗？

My current plan includes going to San Francisco upon my return, though I do have the choice of a semi-permanent job with Nike in the middle of nowhere. Or I could stay in Italy; but if I spend another year single, according to my mother, I will die alone.
我现在的计划包括，回国后前往旧金山，尽管我确实也可以选择在某个偏远的地方半永久性地为耐克工作。或者我可以留在意大利；但如果我接下来的一年还是单身的话，用我妈妈的话说，我会孤零零地死去的。

Crying in my cappuccino
喝着卡布奇诺哭泣的人