千奇百怪的公民入籍考试

The most famous story about citizenship tests points up their essential wrongness. In 1947, the great Austrian logician Kurt Gödel went to a hearing in Trenton, New Jersey, to acquire American citizenship. His friends Albert Einstein and the economist Oskar Morgenstern came along. The story has long been shrouded in myth, but "the lost Morgenstern document", containing Morgenstern's 1971 memories of the affair, surfaced some years ago. We now know what happened.
有个关于公民资格考试的最著名故事，让我们看出此类考试的根本缺陷。1947年，伟大的奥地利逻辑学家库尔特•哥德尔(Kurt Gödel)前往美国新泽西州特伦顿(Trenton)参加听证会，以获得美国国籍。他的朋友阿尔伯特•爱因斯坦(Albert Einstein)和经济学家奥斯卡•摩根斯坦(Oskar Morgenstern)也陪他前往。这个故事长期被披上传奇外衣，但丢失的"摩根斯坦文档"（记载着摩根斯坦1971年对那次考试的回忆）前些年又找到了。现在我们知道当时发生了什么。

Gödel had taken the hearing seriously. "Since he is a very thorough man," recorded Morgenstern, "he started informing himself about the history of the settlement of North America by human beings. That led gradually to the study of the History of American Indians, their various tribes, etc."
哥德尔很重视那次听证会。"由于他是个特别较真的人，"摩根斯坦回忆道，"他开始研究人类在北美定居的历史。这慢慢地又让他考察上了美洲印第安人的历史、他们的不同部落等问题。"

Eventually Gödel got to the American constitution, and made a terrifying discovery: a malevolent president could exploit a loophole and set up as a fascist dictator! Ah, said Einstein and Morgenstern, best not to raise this at the hearing.
最后，哥德尔查阅了美国《宪法》，并得出了一个令人恐怖的发现：一个心存邪念的总统可能利用其中的一个漏洞，让自己成为法西斯主义独裁者！算了吧，爱因斯坦和摩根斯坦都说，你在听证会上最好别提这一点。

Morgenstern drove them all to Trenton. In the car, Einstein teased: "Now, Gödel, are you really well prepared for this examination?" As Einstein had intended, the remark made Gödel even more anxious.
摩根斯坦开车载着大家来到了特伦顿。在车里，爱因斯坦拿哥德尔取乐："哥德尔，现在你当真对这次考试准备充分了吗？"正如爱因斯坦所料，这话让哥德尔愈发焦虑了。

In Trenton, the judge asked Gödel where he came from. "Where I come from? Austria," replied Gödel in heavy Teutonic tones. The judge asked him about Austria's form of government. Gödel explained: "It was a republic, but the constitution was such that it finally was changed into a dictatorship."
到了特伦顿，法官问哥德尔从哪里来。哥德尔用浓重的日耳曼口音回答："我从哪里来？从奥地利来。"法官又问他奥地利是什么政体。哥德尔解释道："奥地利是共和政体，但宪法是如此的无力，结果变成了一个独裁国家。"

"Oh! This is very bad," said the judge, and added consolingly: "This could not happen in this country." "Oh yes it can!" shouted Gödel, "I can prove it." Whereupon Einstein, Morgenstern and the judge hastily shut him up, and the hearing concluded. That's because these tests require only memorised factual answers. Any deeper knowledge creates trouble.
法官表示，"哦，这可太不幸了。"然后如释重负地表示："这种情况不可能会发生在美国。""不对，美国有可能发生，"哥德尔喊了出来，"我可以证明这一点！"法官、爱因斯坦所和摩根斯坦都赶紧让他闭嘴，听证会就此结束。这是因为，应对这类考试只需要背诵事实型答案。更深入的知识会招来麻烦。

And even a modest factual test is probably pointless. It would be nice to live in a polis where all citizens have some familiarity with the Magna Carta, but we never will. To be a citizen, it doesn't matter what you know, or what crazy stuff you have in your head. If you believe homosexuals are infidels, that's fine. In a democracy you can believe what you like. You just can't act on certain beliefs.
即便是考察对事实了解程度的难度不大的考试，也很可能毫无意义。要是能生活在每名公民都对《大宪章》有所了解的城邦里，将是一件很理想的事，但我们永远也办不到。要成为一名公民，无论你了解多少知识，或者你心里装了哪些疯狂的想法，这都不要紧。如果你认为同性恋者是异教徒，那也没关系。在民主国家里，你有信仰的自由。你只是不可以依照某些信仰去行事。

Penniless governments could save themselves some cash by ceasing to examine people's minds.
一文不名的政府也可能省下一点钱，别再审查人们心里在想些什么了。