实用社交课堂:5种方式建立人际关系网

Many people try to come off as perfect. They don’t talk about their failures, they hide their shortcomings and they never say anything that could embarrass them.
许多人总想表现得完美无缺。他们不愿谈起失败经历，对自己的缺点遮遮掩掩，也从不说些会使自己尴尬的事情。

This is all just a facade though. You may appear perfect to some, but you know you’re not perfect and they know that too. You’re only human and humans have flaws.
可这一切都只是表象而已。或许你在某些人面前表现得很完美，但你很清楚自己并不完美，何况他们也看得出来。你是个人，人无完人，都会有缺点。

However, by hiding your flaws, what you do succeed in is appearing cold and impersonal. You seem like a marble statue rather than a real person. And this makes it very hard for anyone to connect with you emotionally.
而且，藏起缺点只会让你看上去漠然无情。你更像一尊大理石雕像，而不是活生生的人。而这样更难让别人从情感上接近你了。

Humans connect with other humans, not with ideals. Keep this in mind and don’t be afraid to let your vulnerability and your humanity show. This is what takes a relationship to the next level.
人是在跟人打交道，而不是在跟理想打交道。请记住这一点，别怕在人面前显露你的脆弱和感性，只有这样才能使人际关系更进一步。

4. Have Integrity
4. 坦诚相待

Integrity, as I see it, is the alignment between your thoughts, your words and your actions. When you say what you think and you do what you said you’ll do, you have integrity.
我觉得坦诚体现在人的思维、言谈及举止当中。如果你能说你所想、做你所说，你便是个坦诚的人。

This is a crucial trait because if you have integrity, people can trust you. They can trust you to give them an honest feedback, even when it’s hard to shallow, and they can trust you to keep your promises.
坦诚的性格非常重要，因为这样人们才会信任你。人们相信你的评价会比较中肯，即便有时会忠言逆耳，人们也会相信你能遵守承诺。

This trust is one of the central pillars of a strong relationship, both in your personal and your professional life. So, as challenging as it can be sometimes, always try to have integrity.
这种信任是可靠人际关系的中流砥柱，对你的生活与工作都很重要。所以，尽管有时候要做到坦诚并不容易，但还是试试吧。

Be honest with the people around you, even when this will initially hurt them. It’s more important for them to trust you than to not feel hurt. And always do what you promised. Even better, think twice before you promise anything, and only promise what you really can and you are willing to do.
与周围的人坦诚相待，哪怕刚开始这么做会伤害到他们。比起伤感情来，赢得他们的信任更为重要。而且，一定要践行诺言。许下承诺前最好先想清楚，觉得是自己力所能及又非常乐意的事情时再作保证。

5. Be There For Others
5. 随时伸出援手

Another central pillar of strong relationships is support. Connections between people grow sturdy if they can rely on each other for support when it’s needed, whether that support means a few kind words or several massive actions.
可靠人际关系的另一个顶梁柱就是支持。如果能在需要时伸出援手，不管是几句安慰的话还是大刀阔斧的实际行动，人与人之间的纽带都能变得更加牢固。

Of course, you can’t be there for everybody, all the time. Your time, energy and other resources are limited. But what you can do is identify the genuinely important people in your life and then seek to be there as much as possible, at least for them.
当然，你不可能随时都能帮上每个人的忙。毕竟人的时间、精力和其他资源都是有限的。但是你可以区别出你生活中真正重要的人，然后尽可能在他们需要时提供帮助。

Your support will help them practically, and it will comfort them emotionally; which makes one hell of a difference in a relationship.
你对能在实际上给他们帮助，给他们带来情感上的抚慰，而这能给你俩的关系带来质的飞跃。

With the right mindset and the right behavior, you can strengthen a wide range of relationships in your life and advance them as far as they can be advanced.
只要心态正确、举止得体，你可以管理好生活中的各类人际关系，并尽可能地改善它们。

And with strong relationships, not only that you feel more fulfilled, but you feel more connected to the entire world. You feel that your life has real value, you have more fun and you live in the moment. An entire world of opportunities opens up in front of you.
人际关系可靠了，你不仅更有成就感，还会感到自己与整个世界四通八达，觉得生活很有意义；你会很开心，会珍惜当下。全世界的机会都向你敞开大门。

Then your task is to simply walk through the open doors.
然后，你只需抓住那些机会就行。