约会技巧:和女生约会一定要花钱吗？

Shannon was on a date with a guy (we'll call him Sean) who had been chasing her for the better part of a decade. She finally caved into his advances and agreed to go on a casual date at a local bar. Shannon was not a fancy, prissy type. She played in an intramural softball league, preferred flip flops to high heels and owned a handicapped dog. But when he uttered the fatal words "So do you mind splitting the check?" she assumed one thing; he wasn't interested.
香农曾经遇到个一个男的，（暂且叫他肖恩）。这个肖恩苦追了香农很多年了，现在，香农终于答应肖恩，在当地一个酒店共享晚餐。香农不是个挑剔讲究的女孩，喜欢垒球、相比高跟鞋更喜欢人字拖，还养着一条残疾狗狗。但是，当饭后买单时，肖恩说出：“介不介意AA？”时，香农心理顿时觉得：“他原来不是很看重这次约会。”

Things fizzled between them and Shannon later learned Sean was interested, but he was flat broke. She was perplexed. If he was so low on cash, why didn't he take her somewhere less expensive? Or to a free art gallery? Or a movie in the park? Or a dive bar instead of the fancy wine bar he had picked out?
就是因为最后的这一出，他俩的关系似乎没什么进展。香农事后才知道，其实不是肖恩不看重那次约会，而是他当时真没什么钱。然而，让香农百思不解的是，既然都没钱了，为什么不选个一般点的地方吃饭？或是去参观免费的画廊、或是去公园看场免费电影；或是就到个廉价小酒馆也好。

In What Men Really Want: For Ladies To Pay On The Date Too, we learned that many men would like women to start paying their way when it comes to dating. But in all seriousness, what those men fail to realize is that most women are not out for a free ride. For Shannon, it wasn't about his money — it was about being courted.
男人也许在约会的时候也希望女性承担自己那一部分开销。我们知道有些男士是会在约会时要求女性承担自己的开销的，但是，严肃的讲，男人根本不理解女人出来约会其实不是为了占小便宜，就香农的例子而言，香农在约会时不是在乎肖恩的钱多钱少，更在乎的是是否有被追求的感觉。

Yes, it's 2013, but in these days of texting instead of calling, late-night booty calls instead of dates, men disappearing and reappearing, it's nice to have a little old-fashioned romance. Women may have increased wealth and equality, but some things may never change. Gold diggers aside, most women don't care how much a man drops on a date. According to a Match.com study, 46 percent of women say it doesn't really matter how much a date spends on the evening, and 58 percent of women are not even looking for an expensive date. A whopping 75 percent of women do not want to eat dinner at a fancy restaurant.
是的，现在是2013年了，到了短信比电话重要，夜间的电话比白天的重要，男人去了又来的年头。但是那些传统的浪漫在这时不是更弥足珍贵吗？在就当下，女人的社会价值和平等性和男人并无异，但是有些东西却从未改变。当然，今天的话题和拜金女无关，我们说的是大多说女性并不在意男性在约会时花多少钱。根据Match.com做的调查，百分之46的女性认为约会时的开销并不重要，百分之58的女性不会刻意寻找有钱人约会，高达75的女性其实根本就不期望约会的时候在很贵的餐厅消费。

Historically courtship has revolved around "a man proving to a woman that he values her," says psychotherapist Tina B. Messina. In the days before women were CEOs and doctors, a woman would lose all of her wealth to her husband once she was married. So it was imperative that a man proved to both the woman and her family that he could take care of her. Hence a man paying and providing for a woman.
精神治疗师蒂娜说过，有史以来，求偶都是围绕着“男人如何向女人表达自己有多看重她”而开展的。在女人没有资格和男人获得同样的社会地位的时代，女人一旦嫁人，就会失去的财富，所以，男人要用各种方法向让女人和她的家人证明一旦女人嫁给他，会受到很好的照顾。这也是男人为什么为女人买单的历史原因。