正文
第一次约会一定要定在周日
Whenever people are given too many choices, we get confused and do the wrong thing. We order the Sriracha burger at McDonald’s. We schedule a first date on a Monday.
当人们面临太多选择的时候,他们就会头晕目眩,做出错误的选择。所以我们在麦当劳点了辣酱汉堡,我们把第一次约会定在了周五。
Friday night was never ideal. Friday’s fatal flaw is this: If you’re monopolizing someone’s Friday night, the pressure is on to make it a really, really good first date—you’re up against all the wonders that Friday night holds. You're also up against all the other people who are on dates on Friday night: Nothing says "romance" like a two-hour wait for space at the bar, where she'll end up perched on a tiny stool and you'll end up hovering nearby, jostled by people reaching through your conversation to order margaritas which will inevitably spill on your pants. Additionally, it stands to reason that you should plan dates on nights when you know you’re going to be your best self.
周五晚上绝非约会的最佳时间。这个时间点的致命缺陷在于:如果你打算独占对方周五晚上全部的时间,你会面临极大的压力,必须让这个首次约会非常非常棒才行。你是在与周五晚上所有的精彩时刻相对抗。同时你还在与所有其他周五晚上约会的人相对抗:想想看,你们花了两个小时才等到酒吧里有空位,她只能坐在一张小小的高脚凳上,你只能在她周围徘徊,周围的人不断的碰撞你们,插身去点他们的玛格丽塔酒,让你们无法交谈,他们的酒总会溅到你的裤子上。另一方面,按道理说你也应该知道自己什么时间状态最佳,将自己的约会定在那个时候。
If I learned anything from church growing up, it’s that Sunday is the best day to find love. Every Sunday, churchgoers throw on their most pastel pastels and hurry to the church to worship and flirt. This is why all the pious people I know married each other within three months of meeting. Sunday is a very auspicious day for lovers.
如果说我在成长过程中曾在教堂里学到什么,那就是,周日是发现爱最好的日子。每到周日,人们都会穿上最好的衣服赶往教堂,他们在那里崇拜上帝,也相互调情。这就是为什么我说认识的所有虔信上帝的爱侣都是在认识对方三个月内的时间就结婚了。周日对寻找爱侣的人来说是一个好日子。
On Sundays you're not competing with a million Friday night revelers for bar stools, and you're not competing with all the cool Friday night parties your date could be at that night. Still, the best thing about Sunday is its distance from the horrors of the workweek. I enjoy my job, but I do not enjoy talking about it on dates. My ideal would be to make it to the altar without knowing what my chosen mate does for a living.
在周日你不用和数以百万的在周五晚上狂欢纵饮的人竞争,不用和你的约会对象本可以参加的所有周五夜狂欢聚会竞争。不仅如此,周日最好的是,它与恐怖的工作日相隔甚远。我喜欢自己的工作,但是我不喜欢约会的时候谈论工作。我的理想是直到自己走进教堂都不知道我选择的新娘靠什么生活。
On weekday dates, it’s impossible to avoid work-talk. You ask me “How was your day?” and I immediately launch into a tirade about my enemy. Then you launch into a tirade about your office enemy and then we’re stuck in a work-talk spiral till death do us part.
在工作日期间的约会中,你不可能避开关于工作的话题。你问我“今天过得怎么样?”我马上开始长篇大论的讲述我的敌人的故事。接着你又开始长篇大论的讲述你的办公室敌人的故事。接着我们就会深陷在关于工作的交谈的泥沼之中,直到死亡让我们分离。