老友记第八季mp3和剧本下载808:The One With The Stripper

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The One With The Stripper

[Scene: Central Perk, Joey, Monica, and Chandler are sitting on the couch and chair as Phoebe is getting coffee.]

Rachel: (coming from the bathroom) Hey Pheebs?

Phoebe: Huh?

Rachel: I’m having dinner with my dad tomorrow night, do you wanna come?

Phoebe: Sure. Yeah, he’s kinda sexy.

Rachel: Oh no, no, I’ll be there too.

Phoebe: Okay so, we’ll just come up with some kind of signal if it’s going well you can take off.

Rachel: No Phoebe! I just need you there for support. I haven’t told him I’m pregnant yet.

Phoebe: Oh. Why not?

Rachel: ‘Cause I know he’s gonna flip out and I hate it when he’s angry.

Phoebe: Oh Rachel, this is all so ‘Papa don’t preach.’

Rachel: What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again he’d make me eat the entire pack.

Phoebe: Wow! Oh well, I will be there!

Rachel: Thank you.

Phoebe: Gosh. I’m not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.

Monica: (recognizing him and panicking) No you don’t!

Rachel: (panicking) No you don’t.

Phoebe: Oh my God!!! Monica!! He’s the stripper from your bachelorette party!!

Chandler: Her what?!!

Phoebe: Your secret bachelorette party…

Chandler: You had a bachelorette party?!

Phoebe: She untied his G-string with her teeth. (Pause) Somebody stop me!

Chandler: I thought we weren’t gonna have bachelor/bachelorette parties! Y’know, we agreed that it was a silly tradition.

Joey: It’s a grand tradition!

Monica: I’m sorry, they surprised me. There was nothing I could do!

Rachel: Well you could’ve untied it with your hands.

Joey: This is so unfair! The one thing I wanted to do was throw my best friend a bachelor party, but no, I wasn’t allowed to. All I got was a stupid steak dinner!

Chandler: You went home with the waitress.

Joey: Oh yeah, that was a pretty good night.

Chandler: I can’t believe you didn’t tell me! You know that the two pillars of marriage are openness and honesty!

Monica: Ugh, I knew giving you that book was gonna come back and bite me in the ass!

Opening Credits

[Scene: A Restaurant, Rachel and Phoebe are having dinner with Dr. Green, and everyone is looking at the menu.]

Dr. Green: How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken?

Phoebe: Oh, I-I don’t eat meat.

Dr. Green: It’s chicken.

Phoebe: Yeah, I don’t eat that either.

Dr. Green: I’ll never understand you lesbians. (To Rachel) So baby, tell me…what is new with you.

Rachel: Well actually umm…

Waiter: (interrupting) Your ’74 Lafite sir.

Dr. Green: ’74?! I ordered the ’75! That’s a magnificent wine! The ’74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! (The waiter’s dumbfounded) Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why you’re a waiter?

Waiter: This is why I told the manager I wouldn’t wait on you tonight! (Runs off.)

Dr. Green: Oh come on! Don’t be such a baby! (Goes after him)

Rachel: (To Phoebe) In case you didn’t notice, that is a scary man.

Phoebe: He’s right though, the ’74 is absolute piss.

Rachel: This was such a huge mistake. I can’t tell him Phoebe. I can’t, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t…

Phoebe: Rachel!

Rachel: No it’s okay, this is what