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恋人间吵架 如何快速和好

2011-09-29来源:videojug

How To Stop A Row In 30 Seconds
Whether it's your partner, fiance or wife/ husband; all relationships have row's and arguments. To avoid the row escalating into something more serious, learn how to get out of that argument before it's even started with our guide to how to stop a row in 30 seconds.

Step 1: Nip it in the bud(别说,听对方说)
The first thing you need to do is listen hard. Don't say anything- this can be mistaken for wanting a row. You need to find out what's up. If it can be undone, undo it - right now. Now apologise, and apologise again. There, job done. Row over.

If it can't be undone you'll have to move onto...

Step 2: Suspend your ego(先把自尊心放一边)
If it can't be undone, you're probably going to get shouted at. Being on the receiving end of a ball breaking isn't pleasant, and your first instinct may be to react in kind. Don't. However aggrieved you feel about this row - just take it on the chin. Especially if the reason for the argument doesn't mean too much to you. It will save you a lot of time and energy if you don't fight back. Hear what she has to say, and nod as if you agree. Wait for her to take a breath, and....

Step 3: Apologise(道歉)
Now say sorry, sincerely. Even if it wasn't your fault. Try and turn the words she has just used to berate you with into an apology- so she knows you have listened to her complaint. So for instance if her complaint is that she had to walk all the way home from ballet class in her tutu, because you didn't collect her in the car, then say "I'm really sorry that you had to walk all the way home from ballet class in your tutu, because I didn't collect you in the car."

By proving that you listened, she may be distracted enough to forget that you haven't come up with a solution. And this may not be important to her anyway. Coming up with a solution is a very male way of thinking. She may just want some support. But keep apologising, just to be safe.

If she accepts the apology now, you are home and dry, but if she is still going ballistic....

Step 4: Supersize it(带Ta去做点新鲜的事)
Make the issue that has annoyed your partner seem tiny by introducing something gargantuan. It may be a lie, it may be the truth, but it must have a profoundly dramatic effect, and involve your tears. Perhaps you just got a job on an oil-rig. Perhaps you are taking her on holiday to Hawaii. Perhaps you just saw Brad Pitt in Sainsbury's. Whatever it is, make it so big, that the original row is completely swallowed up by it.