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如何对付那些喜欢争辩的人?

2010-09-07来源:和谐英语

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视频文本】

Some people just love to argue. Since you won’t always be able to avoid them, learn some techniques for defusing the argument and keeping the peace.

You Will Need

Understanding
Defusing techniques
Self-control
Patience
Focus
A willingness to walk away

Step 1: Understand people who like to argue(学会理解对方)
Understand that argumentative people, especially if they tend to become aggressive, have a deep-rooted personal problem. They like to argue, and they like to win – period.

Unlike people who enjoy the mental exercise of debate, argumentative people argue because of the sense of power and control it gives them.

Step 2: Be aware and engage defusing techniques(试着去安抚对方,缓和紧张气氛)
Recognize that the person who started to argue with you may be this kind of person. Begin to employ defusing techniques.

Step 3: Don't engage in an argument with them(避免与对方争论)
Don’t get drawn into an argument or, if already drawn in, try to win it. You won’t – at least not without causing the argument to escalate and possibly turn nasty.

Never let an argument become personal by using words that attack the person, and never say, “You are wrong.”

Step 4: Listen to them(聆听对方,不要打断)
Listen to what the person has to say and don’t cut them off, which will only anger them.

Step 5: Show that you are listening and respect their view(表明自己接受他们的观点)
Use words that show you respect their views and repeat their main points to show that you are listening.

Some positive phrases to use are “I believe what you are saying is…,” “I understand,” and “Thanks for letting me know your opinion.”

Step 6: Use self-control and stay focused on the issues(学会自控,就事论事)
Use self-control and stay focused on the issues being discussed. Don’t let the person turn the discussion back into a no-win argument.

Step 7: Walk away(走开一会)
If this person is determined to argue, say something neutral, like, “I’ll have to give this more thought,” and walk away.

Did you know? Researchers have tied participating in high school debate teams with increased literacy and higher grades.