经济学人下载:哭泣的白手帕(2)

But this degradation was new. She and her companions, all virgins, so innocent, had been plucked from their camp to service queues of impatient army officers. To aid selection in the brothel, the names of flowers were pinned to their bedroom doors. She was also given a vase of white orchids which, in fear and disgust, she threw away. Ever after, she hated to be given flowers.
但这种耻辱是新的。简和她的同伴们，都是纯洁无瑕的处女，他们被拉出营地，为排队等候的不耐烦的军官们服务。为了帮助挑选，花的名字被钉到她们卧室的门上。简也得到了一瓶白兰花，在恐惧和恶心之中，她把花扔掉了。从那以后，简就讨厌被人送花。

As night fell, the first officer came to her room. He was bald, fat and repulsively ugly. When she wept, screamed and kicked him, crying "Don't!" in all the languages she knew, he simply laughed. Then he unsheathed his sword. As she huddled and prayed, expecting to be killed at any moment, he let the sword-tip wander over her body, up and down, up and down, before ripping off what was left of her clothes and raping her. She never imagined suffering like this. It seemed he would never stop. But physical hurt was only part of it. Far worse was the shame.
夜幕降临时，第一个军官来到她的房间。他又秃又胖，非常丑陋。当她哭着，喊着，踢打他，用所有她知道的语言喊着不要的时候，他只是笑笑。然后他拔出他的剑。在她蜷缩起来祈祷，期待随时被杀的时候，他让剑尖在她身上上下移动，然后扯掉她身上剩下的衣服，强奸了她。简从未想过会遭遇这样的折磨。他似乎永远都不会停下来。但是身体的伤痛只是其中的一部分。更糟糕的是羞耻。

She could not have helped it, he was too heavy. But her pure young body, the body she had been planning to dedicate to Christ as a Catholic nun, had been destroyed. Her dignity and self-esteem were lost. In the bathroom afterwards, with the other sobbing and destroyed girls, she tried to wash off the soiling, but it stayed. Desperate, the girls tried to hide in the garden, but they were dragged out to be raped by more officers. It might have been ten times that night, and the next night, for three months. The brothel doctor raped them, too. Ever after, she feared both doctors and the dark.
简挣扎不开，军官太胖了。但是她那纯洁的年轻的身体，她本打算作为天主教修女奉献给基督的身体，却被毁了。她失去了尊严和自尊。她和其他啜泣的、被摧毁的女孩们事后洗澡时，想洗掉身上的污物，但是不能。女孩们很绝望，她们想藏在花园里，但是她们被拖了出来，被更多的军官们强奸。那天晚上可能有十次，第二天也是如此，就这样持续了三个月。那里的医生也强奸了他们。自那以后，她就害怕医生和黑暗。